


Who doesn't love a clichéd love story?

by ImPanicingAtTheDisco



Category: Greek and Roman Mythology
Genre: (ironically), F/M, Fluff and Humor, Hera deserves better, I'm Bad At Tagging, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Inspired By Tumblr and Lore Olympus on Webtoon, Modern AU, Tags May Change, Zeus is a DICK, more relationships will be added in the future, possible future smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-10
Updated: 2019-04-16
Packaged: 2019-07-29 01:59:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 23,188
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16254371
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ImPanicingAtTheDisco/pseuds/ImPanicingAtTheDisco
Summary: All gods suffer in silence, they know that their eternities always end.-“Wow, and I thought nature goddesses were sweethearts.” He snickered. “Maybe you should take lessons from your mother on how to suck less.”And with those words, a seething red veil of rage fell over her mind, and his fate was sealed. “Oh yeah?! Well suck on this!” She howled as she punched him straight in the dick and hurled the door shut.





	1. Missing dog, if found contact the Lord of the Dead

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, this is one of my favorite ships. Like, it's the actual best. Hades is such a nerd, and Persephone kicks ass. True love, lol.

All gods suffer in silence, they know that their eternities always end.

-

February 27, 1997

Eos heard crows screeching from high in the fog enshrouded mountaintops. Her fingertips ran around the rough contours of the cliffside she sat on, legs swinging freely over the edge. She felt no fear, there would be no end for her unless she chose it.

She wanted to cry, but her tears were gone. The weeping of days past had drained her dry, and her body was wrecked with unshed sorrows. She stared at the ground beneath her, thousands of feet away, but still so heartbreakingly close.

She heard the padding of her husbands footsteps on the ground behind her, and she motioned for him to sit beside her. “It would be so easy to end. All we would have to do is choose it. We could fade so quickly.” Her voice sounded empty, the world had taken so much from her. She was slowly breaking, the once tiny fractures that littered her body now spreading, shattering becoming an inevitable outcome.

“We’ve lasted so long and lost so much.” She laughed bitterly and continued. “Leaving would be a kindness.”

Astraeus sighed and took her hand. “I know. I lost her too, I know how it feels.” His voice trembled, he was so afraid of losing her too. “How much it hurts. But please, don’t give up yet. Just - just try. Just stay.”

Eos hummed and looked out over the mountains once more. “Darling, I’ll stay as long as you want me to. Anyways,” She smiled a bit as she continued. “She would be so disappointed in me if I left you here all alone.”

He laughed and hugged her tightly to him. “She would, wouldn’t she.”

She giggled and wiped away a tear. “You know, she always said to stay with your favorite idiot.”

Astraeus smiled. “Oh, and you think that she meant that I was the idiot? Well, beautiful, I have some bad news for you.”

She rolled her eyes at him, and the knot of sorrow slowly eased in her chest. “Darling, I think you know who she was talking about.” She rested her head on his shoulder and went on in a near whisper. “What do you think she would want us to do?”

He thought quietly for a moment before replying. “I think...I think that we will figure it out as we go. I think it’ll be okay.”

She smiled once more, and with a flash of light, they were gone.

-

Present day

Kore yelped as Aphrodite pulled her hair into a particularly tight braid. “What was that for?” She reached up to loosen the braid and the older goddess slapped her hands away.

“Hey! No touching the artwork, peasant.” She popped her bubblegum and kept on braiding. “Maybe if you would learn to braid your own hair, I wouldn’t still be doing this.”

“That doesn’t mean that you try to rip the hair from my scalp! You know that hair pulling hurts.” She frowned and shifted in her seat.

Aphrodite grinned down at her. “I bet you wouldn’t mind if a certain son god pulled your hair, huh?” She wiggled her eyebrows suggestively.

Kore groaned as she blushed. “Oh gods, Aphrodite. What’s wrong with you? You know that this is just a date, right? It’s not I’m gonna do the horizontal tango with him on a first date.”

“Well, hopefully, you never do anything with him. He is actual garbage, and you deserve the best. Which he is the opposite of.” She tapped Kore’s head. “Move to the right a bit.”

“Why are you even going on a date with him? You are so out of his league.” “Well,” She said as she brushed a stray strand of her dark curly hair behind her ear. “I just want to try dating for once, and my mom approves of him, so…” She trailed off.

Aphrodite sighed. “Out of all the guys your mom could approve of, it had to be him.” She stood back to admire her work. “Alright. Kore, I think this is as good as it will get.”

The young goddess smiled at her friend. “It looks beautiful. Thank you.” Kore stood and grabbed her jacket and scarf from her friends chair and walked to the door. “Alright, wish me luck. I’m gonna need it.”

-

Kore walked down the New York sidewalk, lost in thought and muttering to herself. “Hi, I’m Perseph - wait no that sounds dumb. Maybe I should use Kore...but everyone calls me Kore. Ugh, what is with these stupid _names_!”

Her mother, in all of her infinite wisdom, had named her Persephone and the proceeded to only call her and introduce her as Kore. The poor had no idea why, though she suspected that it had something to do with her mysteriously absent father. Luckily, it didn’t affect her much, as she usually completely forgot about her real name.

She was so wrapped up in her own mind that she walked straight into a wall. At least, that’s what it felt like to her, since it completely knocked her to the ground.As she laying on the ground, contemplating just who would built a wall on the middle of a sidewalk, an enormous furry face suddenly obscured her vision and began to sniff her.

Kore decided that she must have hit her head harder than she thought, because now she was seeing three dog heads instead of one. “Huh.” She remarked aloud, carefully pushing herself off of the ground. “There’s no way that I hit my head hard enough to see a three headed dog, right.”

She squinted suspiciously at the beast. It’s head (Heads?) towered above her, and it seemed to be friendly, if it’s wagging tails were anything to go by. Her next actions spoke a lot about who she was, as they were extremely impulsive and not at all thought through.

“Hello,” She cooed, reaching up to scratch under the gigantic dogs chin. “Who’s a good boy? Who’s a good boy? You’re the best boy, yeah?” The dog suddenly bent down and began to excitedly lick her face. She laughed and tried to push him away. “Ew, yuck, your spit got in my mouth, gross.”

She finally got the giant dog to calm down and then nodded as she made a decision. “Well, you seem like a perfectly nice dog to me. I guess you can live with me until we find your owner, okay?” She unwrapped her scarf from around her neck and looped it through the dog’s giant chain collar.

“Huh. It’s says that your name is Spot.” She smiled. “Nice to meet you, Spot.” Kore patted his head again and turned around and began walking home with her new giant dog, weaving unaware through a crowd of shocked and terrified looking pedestrians. As she strolled into the last car on the subway, she wondered why it wasn’t as crowded as usual. “I guess I should tell Apollo that I can’t make it.” She thought to herself as the subway began moving.

“There’s no way I can just show up to a date with a gigantic dog and act like that’s perfectly normal. And how in Gaea’s name am I going to get this enormous dog into my tiny college dorm?”

-

Hades frowned as he watched Hecate hang up another “Missing dog” poster.

“Hecate, are you sure that these will work? I don’t think anyone who sees a giant three headed dog’s first thought will be to call the number on a random poster.”

“Ugh.” The goddess of magic rubbed a hand against her shorn brown hair and turned towards him. “Look, I get that you don’t get out much, but everyone uses these. It’s how mortals find animals.”

“Hm.” He glanced over at the god of death. “Thanatos, what do you think?”

The ashen-faced god tilted his head. “I am afraid that I can offer no opinion on the matter, my lord, as I am blind.” He didn’t bother to hide the snickers in his voice as he high-fived Hecate.

Hades leveled him with a look. “You can tone down the sarcasm over there. I simply wanted to know if you thought that it would work.”

Thanatos laughed. “Calm down my Lord. It must be hard for you to be more uptight than the god of death.”

“Yeah, take that massive stick out of your butt.” Chimed in a giggling Hecate. Hades’ scowl deepened, causing his messy black hair to fall in his eyes.

“I don’t have a stick-” He was cut off by Thanatos and Hecate loudly whispering about how desperately he needed to get laid. It was the fifth time they had laughed about his lack of action that day. “Okay.” He sighed, throwing his hands in the air. “That’s it. I give up. I’m done and I’m going home.”

He turned and walked away, completely ignoring his friends yelling at him to get a girlfriend. Hades smiled fondly as soon as he was out of sight. They might be immortal pains in his butt, but they were _his_ pains in the butt. With his estrangement from his family, those two nerds were all he had left. He wouldn't let them know ow much that they meant to him, of course. That was just asking for incessant teasing.

-


	2. Oh look, she punched a god in the dick

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Yeah, well, maybe you should go throw yourself off off of Olympus.” Persephone retorted sharply, doing her damnedest to slam the door in Apollo’s face.
> 
> “Wow, and I thought nature goddesses were sweethearts.” He snickered. “Maybe you should take lessons from your mother on how to suck less.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess who gets introduced in this chapter?!

“Yeah, well, maybe you should go throw yourself off of Olympus.” Kore retorted sharply, doing her best to slam her dorms door in Apollo’s face.

“Wow, and I thought nature goddesses were sweethearts.” He snickered. “Maybe you should take lessons from your mother on how to suck less.”

And with those words, a seething red veil of rage fell over her mind, and his fate was sealed. “Oh yeah?! Well _suck on this_!” She howled as she punched him straight in the dick and hurled the door shut.

She sighed and slumped to the ground against the weathered wooden door, studiously ignoring the sun god’s agonized whimpers on the other side. How was she going to explain to her mother that instead of going on a date with a (very parentally approved) god, she had screamed at him and then punched him straight in the fruit stick. It wasn’t like it was her fault.

She had politely texted him that she wouldn’t be able to make it to their date and would love to meet up sometime next week, and had then left to buy Spot a metric ton of dog food. Things had went downhill from there.

Somehow, Apollo had tracked down her location, and then began stalking her through the store, both annoying her and throwing random stuff into her cart. Apparently, he was pissed that she hadn’t made it to their date. She had tried to tolerate him to be polite, but soon he turned from an actual piece of garbage into the disgusting juice at the bottom of old dumpsters.

He had started trying to feel her up, so she angrily slapped his hands away and tried to run home and hide. Unfortunately, Apollo had followed her home and then proceeded to try and come inside and attempt to get in her pants.

It didn’t end well for him. Obviously.

In a horrible way, this was a good thing. At least now she knew how terrible he was, and she could avoid him with no guilty feelings. Unfortunately, she now had an at least five foot, five hundred pound, extremely hungry dog, and the strong possibility of another earth-shaking fight with her mother.

The fights that she had with her mother were legendary. Kore and Demeter were so different that they were constantly clashing with each other. The fights drained all the warmth and color from the world, turning it into a dull, drab version of itself; even the other gods avoided them when they raged against each other. It was exhausting to be in one of those fights, Kore never felt quite right for weeks afterwards.

Kore decided to take Spot for a walk in Central Park to clear her head. Late spring was always beautiful to her, carefully teasing away all of her fear and anger with the soft brushes of blossom-laden trees and the murmur of breezes that promised adventure to those who would follow it.

As she walked through Central Park, she heard a faint sound of wheezing laughter near the point of breathlessness coming from further up the path. When she rounded the bend, she was greeted by the sight of a pale blind man trying to hang a poster as someone she assumed was his friend cackled manically on the ground.

“No no, to the right.” The woman laughing on the ground wiped away a tear as she continued. “No, my right. What are you, blind?”

The man turned around, and you could see that under his dark sunglasses that he was caught somewhere between laughing and cursing his friend out. “Hecate...what are you doing? You know that you need to help me with these posters, he’s going crazy without his dog.” The man fumbled around with the hammer, and ended up smashing his fingers with it.

The tall woman finally stood and took the hammer away from the blind man. “Eh, it’ll be fine. It’s not like it’s easy to miss a three-headed dog.” The white shirt and black jeans that she was wearing now had grass stains on them from her brief venture of laughing on the ground, and her underbust corset had been yanked dangerously to the side.

Spot had been sniffing around the path for the whole time that Kore had been watching the scene unfold.

Suddenly, the great dog broke free from Kore’s (not very useful) scarf leash, and began running towards the two strangers.

“No! Spot, come back!” Yelled Kore, dashing madly after him.

She slowly came to a halt when she noticed that Spot wasn’t trying to run away, he had just began vigorously licking the woman. She wondered if he was just that friendly or if these people were his owners.

The shaven-haired woman turned to Kore, drawing her sleeve across her mouth in a vain attempt to wipe the drool from her face; smiling despite the slobber covering her from head to toe. “You found Cerberus! Thank you for bringing him back!” Exclaimed the woman, still trying to fend off the dogs enthusiastic licking. “He’s been missing for days, and his owner has been going crazy. There’s a good chance that he is unhealthily close to this big mutt.”

She affectionately patted Cerberus’ head.

“Uh..” Kore stumbled over her own words. “I think that you might be mistaken. His collar says that his name is Spot.”

The woman laughed. “Yeah, that’s on me. His owner named him Cerberus, but to bug him I bought a collar with the translated name on it. It’s his own fault for naming the dog that, really.” She smiled fondly as she adjusted her corset. “Sometimes he still complains about it. Good times, good times.”

The tall man beside her spoke up. “Yes, because that’s exactly the thing that you want to do, annoy your boss.” He shook his head. “Ignore Hecate, she’s a terrible example.”

Kore laughed awkwardly. “Well, it’s been nice to meet you. I guess I’ll just-”

She was cut off by Hecate suddenly exclaiming, “Wait, we can’t let you go without lettings Cerberus’ owner thank you! What kind of people do you think we are?” She looped her arm through Kore’s, waving for the blind man to follow. “I’m Hecate and this is Thanatos, by the way. Can’t believe that slipped my mind, my manners must be slipping from hanging around this nerd.” She said brightly, nodding towards Thanatos. “Anyways, what’s your name?”

-

While still chattering on, Hecate hailed a cab and they all squeezed in, trying their best to fit around the giant drooling dog with them. When the cab stopped and they stepped out onto the sidewalk, the first thing that met Kore’s eyes was a towering slate grey building, it’s window covered sides sparkling in the sunlight and pulling your attention to how it looked as if it went on forever. Something about the building was calming. Maybe it was the warmth of the sun around the building, or even the trees surrounding it. It might have even been the way that the buildings color felt like home.

Whatever it was, it made her never want to leave. Any and all tension in her shoulders immediately slid out of her as they walked into the lobby of the building.

Her wide eyes slowly took in the pure white walls that nearly glowed as they walked by them to the elevators; but she was pulled out of her awestruck staring by the click of Hecate’s high heels on the marble floor echoing off of the walls and to the soaring ceiling.

Hecate waved her forward onto the elevator. “Hurry, the elevator is fixing to leave.”

“Hey, who owns Spot?” Questioned Kore.

“...What?” Hecate seemed confused, so Kore continued on.

“I mean, who's apartment are we going to-”

Hecate waved her off. “Yeah, yeah, I got that. What I meant was, don’t you already know who owns Spot?”

“Um, no? That’s kinda why I asked.”

Thanatos turned his head in Kore’s direction. “It’s Lord Hades. He’s the one who owns the mutt.” He bitterly directed his last words at Cerberus, who was doing his best to eat Thanatos’ shoe lace. This resulted in his shoes being covered in dog slobber.

Kore laughed. “No, really, who is it?”

Hecate pulled on Cerberus’ collar as the elevator doors opened. “We just told you who it was - Hades.”

And with these words, the young goddess’ anxiety was thrown into overdrive. Her heartbeat began to speed up, and her chest began to knot up, heart aching. She began to breathe quicker, feeling like no matter how much air she took in, it was never enough. She unconsciously began to scratch at her wrist, unknowingly indulging in the habit as a means to calm herself down.

She was about to meet Hades, the Lord of the Dead, King of Hell. He was one of the oldest, most powerful gods in existence. If she misstepped, he could strike her dead with a snap of his fingers.

As they stepped into a wide open living room, Thanatos walked over to a set of stairs at the side of the room. “Hey, Lord Stick Up Your Butt, you’ll never guess who we just found!” Kore’s jaw dropped at the blatant disrespect in his voice.

Hecate smiled apologetically at Kore. “Yeah, um...Thanatos has harbored a millenia again Hades for adopting Cerberus. The dog might have - well, I won’t get into that right now.”

A tired, wrung-out voice sounded from down the darkened hallway. “So help me Rhea, if you brought me another pug, I swear to the Styx I will throw you out the window.” Out of all the things that Kore was expecting to hear from the Lord of the Dead, that one wasn’t at the top of the list.

A tall, raven-haired man walked around the corner, dark circles under his eyes almost erasing themselves in his beaming grin as he spotted his dog. “Cerberus!” Kore stared at the ancient god in front of her. Why had no one told her that Hades was (pardon the pun) DROP DEAD GORGEOUS?!?!

Hecate snickered while Hades tried his best to hug all three of Cerberus’ heads at once. “Hey, boss man. Stop hugging your dog and say thanks to Kore for finding him.” She shook her head and adjusted her corset. “You’d think he was raised in a barn with the way he behaves.”

Kore was in a desperate battle with herself to not blush or possibly jump Hades when the god in question walked over and shook her hand. The world faded for a minute when Hades shook her hand and spoke. “Thank you so much for finding Cerberus. I don’t know what I would have done without him.” His voice was a rumble, as deep and lazy as the Lethe. “It’s nice to meet you, miss…”

“Oh, it’s just Kore.” Her thoughts jumbled as he beamed down at her. “Um, yeah, it was nothing.” Kore began to scream internally as his smile turned her usually well thought out words into a verbal train wreck.

Kore was pulled out of her extremely vivid (possibly explicite) daydream by Hecate pointing finger guns at Hades and then flipping him off. “I’m gonna go get the mutt some food. Do we have any or should I go buy a bag?”

Kore decided that Hecate must be great friends with Hades, because for someone talking to the literal King of Hell, she was surprisingly nonchalant.

Hades glanced over at the shaven haired goddess. “Yeah, we have some, it’s in the pantry. Hold on and I get it, it’s the big bag.”

Hecate gave him a look. “I am literally the goddess of magic. I think I’ll be fine.” She grabbed Thanatos’ hand and pulled him with her. And with that, they were gone, leaving Kore alone with one of the most powerful gods to exist.

Hades waved her into the living room. “Miss Kore, how do you feel about whiskey?”

-


	3. Kore you thirsty buffoon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Redbull: Drink responsibly

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is what happens when I write while listening to P!ATD while writing.

After the introduction, Hades invited her to have a celebratory drink with them; and she ended up staying for a few hours, relaxing on one of the softest, fluffiest couches she had ever had the pleasure of sitting on. Hades calmly drank whiskey in the chair across from her, and Hecate and Thanatos sat on the other side of the couch with Hecate sitting in Thanatos’ lap and drinking white wine.

Kore sipped her drink and peered around the room.

The living room walls were covered with nearly floor to ceiling bookshelves. The shelves were crammed full of all kinds of books; hardbacks, paperbacks, old, new, even unbound. She wondered if Hades had read them all. It seemed a daunting task, even with a couple thousand years to work with.

Cerberus was sitting beside Hades’ chair, tail wagging as Hades petted him. Somehow, when he was around his owner, all parts of his intimidating presence disappeared. The dog was just a big a big sweetheart. 

Kore was faintly aware that Hades was saying something, but all she could think about was how nice Hades’ hands looked while holding the crystal tumbler. Hades finally caught her attention by clearing his throat. 

A blush seeped into Kore’s cheeks, turning her the deepest shade of red. “Ah, sorry, Lord Hades. I kinda zone out when I mix alcohol and Redbull.” she laughed nervously. 

Hades waved away her concern, “No problem. What I said was - wait.” He paused for a moment. “I didn’t know we had Redbull.”

Hecate snorted. “We don’t. Because  _ someone _ just  _ had to  _ drink four cans in a row the first time they tried them.” She glared at Thanatos.

Kore piped up right before Hecate could begin what would have been a two hour lecture on the dangers of caffeine overdose.“Oh, no, you didn’t have any Redbull; I just drank a lot today and I guess it’s still in my system.”

Hades sat his glass down beside him and gave her a rather concerned look. “How much did you drink that it’s still in your system?”

Kore hunched over her drink and mumbled something incoherent.   
“Sorry, what was that?”

A loud sipping noise echoed from Kore’s glass. She had hoped that if she drank long enough, Hades might develop some sort of memory issue and forget the question, but that didn’t seem to be happening. She sighed and answered. “Well, today was a good day so only…” She trailed off into an undecipherable mutter.

Thanatos grinned from the couch. “C’mon, answer the man. It can’t be  _ that _ bad, right?”

“...Do you want to know how many I drank today or how many I normally drink?”

Hecate leaned in and whispered, “ _ Yes to all.” _

“Eleven.”

Everyone stared at the young goddess. SHe gained confidence in her caffeine addiction as she spoke.

“And that was just today. Normally I lose count after about fifteen, but I have my suspicions about it.” Kore stared at their aghast faces over the rim of her glass. 

Hades picked his drink back up and laughed. “Well, Hecate, now you have someone to focus on yelling at besides me.” He nodded at Kore and grinned. “Now you get to deal with her. Have fun”

And with that, Hecate deadpanned and threw her glass at his face; and the night passed on in a relaxed haze of bad jokes and liquor. 

-

Hades smiled as he shut the door. Kore had left an hour or so ago and he had just kicked out Hecate and Thanatos. It had been a while since he had had someone over besides business partners and those two idiots he called friends. Having a new person over had been...strangely nice.

He would have to have her over again sometime, he decided. It was about time he began interacting with the world again.

A thought crossed his mind and he called Hecate. 

“Hey hey boss man. This is a sooner call than normal, do I need to come clean up a body?” He rolled his eyes as Hecate laughed.

He began to absent-mindedly clean his kitchen as he spoke. “Actually, for once I have a question for you. And no,” He cst her off before she could start yelling into her phone. “It’s not a sarcastic question either, I really need to ask you this.”

“Cool, cool, coolcoolcoolcoolcoolcoolcool. So, uh, what is it? Consider my interest piqued.”

“I was just...wondering...how to tell if someone likes you.”

Her silence spoke volumes. “What do you mean? Or rather,  _ who _ do you mean?”

He cleared his throat and began to crumple his sleeves. “Well, um...there’s a girl, and I kind of like her?”

“Are you asking or telling me that you like her?”

“Telling, moron.”

“Well, in my roaming through Tumblr tags, I found some stuff that tells whether or not a girl likes you. Guys too, but I guess that that isn’t applicable.” She opened her laptop and began searching through her blog. “Okay, settle in, this could take a while.”

-

Astraeus poked his sleeping wife in the arm. “Eos. Eos. Eos. Eos. Eo-’ He stopped annoying her when she slapped his hand away. 

She cracked her eyes open. “Astraeus, why are you trying to make me commit murder right now?”

He smirked at her as he sat down next to her on the bed. “Guess what?”

She just glared at him.

He raised his hands in surrender. “Fine, fine. Just wanted to let you know that Hermes dropped by with some news.”

“Ugh. You know I don’t like you bringing your creepy spy friend here. He freaks me out with his constant recording everything I say.” 

“He doesn’t-”

He stopped when she pulled three confiscated  cheap spy pens from her dresser drawer. “These are from last week alone.”

“Okay, yes. He has done a few weird things,  _ but _ , he has something important to tell us. He said that he saw Kore leaving a park with Hecate and Thanatos, he suspects that she was going to meet Hades.”

Her jaw dropped. “Are you serious?! I swear if you’re lying to me, I’ll punt your ass off of Olympus!”

He grinned as he leaned against the headboard and crossed his arms. “I’m serious. That’s right, for once, you were wron-”

She practically jumped into his lap and hugged him, hundreds of years of loss and sorrow sliding from her face. “This is so amazing.” 

Eos looked up. “She would be so happy. She should be here.”

He hugged her tighter. “I know, darling. I know.”

“Alright.” He laughingly pulled her up from the bed. “Let’s go make a plan.”

-

Kore smiled as she strolled down the street, relaxing in the warm sunshine. Last night had been fun for her, as she didn’t normally talk to new people that much. And if her face turned pink when she thought about Hades, it was no one’s business but her own.

“Kore! Hey, wait up!” The yelling behind her jerked her out of her daydreams, and she looked through the crowd around her to see where that voice was coming from.

A man and woman jogged up to her and the woman enveloped her in a hug. “Kore, it’s been too long!”

Kore squinted at them and slowly pushed the woman away. “Uh, no offense, but I don’t know you. So…”

The woman she had just (rather rudely) pushed away blushed. “Oh, sorry, I guess you wouldn’t recognize us after so long.” She held out her hand to shake Kore’s. “I’m Eos, and this is Astraeus.”

Kore shook her hand. “Nice to meet you. Um, you said you knew me?”

Eos smiled at her. “Yes, we used to babysit you while your mother worked. You were such a cute baby.”

“Wait, I remember you!” Kore pointed at Astraeus. “You used to bake cookies with me. And you-” She stopped for a moment and squinted at Eos. “And you used to teach me how to throw knives, right? Or am I hallucinating.”

Astraeus laughed and shook his head. “Yeah, she used to say that you would need at least one way to defend yourself from people who thought the goddess of spring was defenceless.”

Eos smiled. “Knife throwing is an important skill to learn you know.” She glanced down the street and then back to Kore. “Hey, there’s a cafe over there, would you like to go get coffee?”

Kore laughed. “Of course, I kinda want to know who you’ve thrown knives at lately.”

Astraeus groaned. “Oh Rhea, that’s along list.”

-

Hades sat on his throne, face as impassively stony as the walls around him. The dead were near silent today. They sensed his irritation and kept quiet, and only the occasional moan bounced off of the rocky black walls. The silence made them sound even louder.

Hecate stood quietly behind his throne, wondering how he had possibly went from possibly crushing on Kore (she knew who it was, she wasn’t a fool) last night to looking so pissed off today.

His fingers tapped on the cool arm of his throne, impatiently waiting for the next spirit he needed to judge. His thoughts raced in circles through his mind, he hadn’t been able to stop thinking about Korelast night. Unfortunately, that had meant that he hadn’t slept and he had overthought everything, thus ruining any chance of him ever wanting to speak to anyone ever again.

He was zoned out and staring at the wall. There was no way that Kore could ever fall in love with him. She was a sweet girl, yes - but therein lay the problem. Sweet girls become sweet women, they don’t become queens of Hell. 

A bedraggled spirit bowed in front of him, interrupting his thoughts. “My Lord,” She began, her voice barely audible even in the tomb silent throne room. “I plead mercy.”

He shook all thoughts of Kore from his head, trying to focus instead on the job in front of him. “And why, exactly, do you plead?”

“There were men, my Lord. They took my daughters.” The spirit became more solid as she spoke, as if now that she was talking to him, she could fight for something. “They did terrible, horrible, unspeakable things to them; and then they killed them.”

She now looked almost human, and you could see bloodstains and bruises littering her body - it nearly looked as if some careless artist had thrown red paint on her in an effort to hide the bruises. “They were only children, my Lord, and I did what I had to. What I did to the men was necessary. When I plead mercy, I plead not for myself. I plead for my daughters.”

He sat quietly for a moment, thinking. “Hecate,” He spoke. “Find the men that committed this crime. If they are not already dead, then send Thanatos.”

She nodded, then disappeared. He looked back to the spirit, who was already looking less solid by the second. “You will have your mercy. I grant you and your daughters Elysium. Rest in peace, you deserve it.” 

She smiled as she bowed once more. “Thank you, Lord Hades. I wish you well.”

Hecate relaxed as Hades began to speak to the next spirit. It seemed that he had returned to normal.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys, this chapter was pretty hard to write. I have something super cool I want to put in the story next, but it's going to hard to do. Wish me luck!


	4. What do you mean, further my education?!?!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Is it really worth it?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this chapter is a lot darker than the rest. It could be worse though, you know.

Kore groaned as she - quite literally - rolled out of bed. While she lay in a tangled mess of blankets and limbs on the floor, the young goddess flipped off her alarm clock.

“Why does the morning have to be so damn early?” She grumbled as she flopped around attempting to get dressed while still laying on the floor. “Stupid collage, trying to teach me stuff. How dare they try to further my education.”

As she laid on the floor, fully dressed but still hating life, she asked herself a question that every student in existence has asked themselves. “Is it worth it? I could drop out and become a stripper. I have an okay body, I would be fine.” She cast another hateful look at the doorway. “Is it  _ really worth it. _ ” 

In the end, she decided that it was worth it - at least for now - and left for class. 

-

When she finally made it to class, she flopped down in her usual seat in the back and pulled her near comically large hoodie over her clothes. She jumped, startled, when someone almost beaned her with a can of Redbull. “WHO THE-”

Mid-scream she looked over and noticed that it was Aphrodite. “Oh. it’s just you.” She put her head back down and pulled the blueberry Redbull inside her hood. “I thought you were going to drop this class.

The other goddess sat beside her, pastel pink hair flowing over her black leather jacket. “I was, but then I realized that they were going to be sketching my favorite model live and in person, so there was no way I was going to drop out  _ before _ that.” 

An empty can slowly rolled out of Kore’s hoodie, off the desk, and onto the floor. “Who’s the model? It’s got to be someone amazing to keep you in class when you don’t want to be.” Her voice was muffled, as her head was still on her desk and under a hood.

Aphrodite winked at her, although it went unseen due to Kore’s sleep deprivation-driven hoodie nap. “Why, myself, of course.”

The spring goddess finally looked up. “I swear, the only reason you even take art classes is because you know that the professors will always ask you to be a model.” 

The pink-haired goddess’ gaze moved into the distance. “Yep. Everyone does. Except for that one class, in the spring of ‘94. I’ll never forget it.” She looked back at Kore. “Besides, my reason is still better than your reason.”

Kore flipper her off. “It’s not my fault that my mother is insanely over-involved in my education. Like, how is an art history class going to help me be a spring goddess? I don’t even know what goes through that woman’s head sometimes.”

The other goddess snorted as she twirled her hair around her fingers, light bouncing off her perfectly manicured nails. ”Well, it’s not like she controls  _ every _ class you take. Aren’t you doing that criminal thing?” 

“That ‘criminal thing’,” she said, making quotation marks with her fingers. “Or as it’s more commonly known as, Intro to Criminology.” She tapped her nails on the desk in front of her. “Yeah, mom doesn’t really know about that.”

“Ooh, getting rebellious over here, I see.” Teased Aphrodite, poking Kore in the side.

“Piss off.” Kore laughingly whispered to her as the class started.

-

“Hades!” Came Hecate’s sing-song voice from down the hallway. “I know you’re here.”

The King of Hell groaned as she waltzed into his living room. “Hecate, as much as I love you, I just got off of work. What do you want?”

She flopped down on the couch, one leg on the back of the couch, and the other on the floor. “Ugh, who pissed in your cornflakes? Nevermind.” She waved her hand as she continued. “I found the men you wanted us to find today, they’ve been taken care of.” 

He relaxed as he sat down. At least one thing had gone right today. With that thought, he remembered what had been troubling him all day. “Hecate, how much of an age gap can you have between to people before it gets weird?”

“Why, are you trying to figure out how much older you are than Kore?” She snickered when she saw his un-amused expression. “Yeah, I know who it is. I wasn’t born yesterday. Anyways, to answer your question, I was talking about it to Thanatos, and-”

“You told Thanatos?!” 

“I didn’t have to, he already knew. Honestly, your poker face is complete garbage.” She patted him consolingly. “So what I was saying was, we were talking and Kore is an adult. She’s been alive for a few thousand years, give or take. She can make her own decisions, so if it’s the age difference that’s bothering you, don’t let it. The only bad thing that could come of it is that she gets to make constant old man jokes if she wants.”

He began unconsciously tapping his chair as he answered. “That was weirdly comforting.” He squinted at her. “How many times have you given this speech before?”

-

Hades and Hecate ended up texting Thanatos to bring pizza while they watched Netflix. Hades had been thinking about what Hecate had told him earlier that day, and his mind had been in a spiral ever since.

His eyes brightened with that thought. “That’s it!” He exclaimed, jumping up and leaving the room.

Hecate just sat there for a moment. “...Okay?” She started to mutter to herself as she called Thanatos. “Hey, I think the boss man lost it again. Hide the beanies and fingernail clippers, it might be worse than last time.  _ Of course you need to hide all of the avocado’s, idiot!” _ She hissed the last part into the phone as she glanced down the now-empty hallway.

She refused to have a repeat of Hades’ last mental breakdown. She still shuddered when she thought about dolphins. 

-

Kore was almost bouncing in excitement as she stood in line at her favorite coffee shop, the Raven’s Nest. Her enthusiastic chatter to Aphrodite on the phone was almost drowned out by the rush of the other patrons, all in a hurry to get their coffee and leave. When she finally got to the front of the line, she nearly jumped over the counter in an effort to drown herself in caffeine. 

But what else could be expected from a college student/full time goddess other than constant exhaustion? It was a miracle that she was still standing after three three days with less than two hours of sleep.

She slammed her reusable cup down on the counter, and the poor teenage barista nearly had a heart attack. “Uh...how - how can I help you, ma’am?” He stuttered, fidgeting with his shirt.

She leaned in close, determined to get her point across. “I need you to listen, okay? Good. Now, throw out everything that anyone has ever told you about safe rates of caffeine consumption. They’re all wrong. It’s perfectly safe to add caffeine pills to espresso, no matter what those corporate shills have told you.”

He laughed nervously. “Uh, ma’am, I’m not sure what you mean…”

She glanced down at his nametag. “Joe, is it?” She smirked at bit as she read his name. “Well, Joe, what I mean is, I want you to fill a cup with espresso and then add as many caffeine pills as possible. Not a little cup either. A large. Money is no object, okay?” She grabbed the front of his shirt and pulled him in close. “When I leave here, I want to to ascend to another plane of existence, got it?”

Pure awe entered his eyes as he put in her order. While she waited for her drink to be done, she heard him whispering to his friends that “She was an eldritch being not to be tampered with.” It was always nice to know that someone took her seriously.

As she walked out that door with a cup of pure mania in her hands, she smiled. It was going to be a good day. 

That thought was immediately crushed when someone ran into her at full speed, knocking the drink from her hands. 

“NO! My drink!” She wailed, nearly in tears. “That was the only reason I could get out of bed this morning, and now my baby’s gone! My precious!

The man who had run into her began apologising immediately. “I am so sorry, I just didn’t see you, you’re quite small-”

That comment prompted her to look away from her personal ambrosia to her now mortal enemy. “You come into my house, spill my coffee, CALL ME SHORT!” She stopped when she noticed who it was. “Oh. Hi, Lord Hades. Sorry about the yelling, I didn’t recognize you for a second.”

He looked taken aback by her sudden change in attitude for a moment, the he laughed, and pushed his messy hair out of his eyes. “It’s no problem, I did just spill coffee all over you. Although,” He smiled down at her again. “In my defense, you actually  _ are _ pretty short.”

Her jaw dropped. “Excuse you, but I am a perfectly average height. You’re the one with the height abnormality, Mr. Jolly Green Giant.”

He rolled his eyes. “Sure, if that’s what you have to tell yourself.” He looked back at her coffee, ignoring her irritated mumbling. “Can I buy you another coffee? I’m pretty positive that this one is unredeemable.” 

Kore sighed, trying to dab the coffee off her shirt with her jacket.. “No, I actually have a class that I am fixing to be,” She checked her phone. “Seven minutes late for. Don’t worry, though. I’ll definitely take you up on that offer later.”

As she turned around to begin running to her class, he called out to her. “Could I give you a ride then? It’s the least I can do, what with the whole…” He gestured to the spilled drink on the sidewalk.

She looked at him for a second before shrugging. “Sure, why not. I don’t know if I can do the awkward ‘I’m late to class and I feel like everyone is looking at me’ walk again anyways.”

-

Kore whistled as she got in Hades’ car. “Damn, this is a cool car. What kind is it?”

He motioned for her to put on her seatbelt as he responded. “It’s a Lamborghini Aventador. And possibly the love of my life, so try not to scratch her.”

“Oh no. The passenger seat is the worst place for scratches. How could you possibly do this?!” She snickered. “This is a disaster, you’re going to have to get a whole new car because of all these scratches!”

“...I’m not afraid to drive us into oncoming traffic”

She laughed harder.

When he dropped her off at her class, he gave her his number, just in case, as he put it, she had “an emergency”. 

-

Hades nodded goodbye to Kore as she walked into her class, then smirked. It was all going according to plan. 

He jumped as a voice suddenly sounded from the passenger seat. “Soooo, what’s with the ‘I’m completely right about everything’ smile?” 

He glared at Hecate. “How many times do I have to tell you, don’t just randomly appear in places like that!” If he had a drachma for every time she did that, then he would have enough to wad up and throw at her every time she scared the shit out of him.

She shrugged, leaning up to turn on the radio. “Eh, it keeps you young. You’ll thank me later.” She started to dance along to Panic At The Disco while simultaneously poking him in the side. “Don’t try to avoid the question. Why were you smiling?” 

“Are you going to leave me alone if I answer?”

“Probably not. Come on, tell me. I just wanna know who’s got you looking like you just got laid.” The goddess wiggled her eyebrows at him.

He turned up the radio, not even trying to hide the amusement in his voice. “Your mom.”

-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If the flashback seems a bit different from the rest of the story, it's because it was written a long time ago. It was an imagery piece for my creative writing class, and I changed it to make it fit. If I missed something, be sure to tell me.


	5. Hades is an idiot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Party time~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ugh, Hades is so obtuse. The little nerd.

“Thanatos!” Screeched Hecate as she dashed into the throne room. “You won’t believe this.”

He dropped his scythe and yelped as he danced around trying to avoid losing a leg to the razor-edged blade. “HECATE! YOU DON’T SNEAK UP ON BLIND PEOPLE LIKE THAT!”

She raised her hands in an almost sincere apology. “Geez, sorry. I was just excited.” She carefully handed the god his scythe back. 

“Okay,” He began, sarcasm dripping from him. “First off, I’m trying to reap a soul.” He gestured to the room with an old man in a bed with a flat lined heart monitor beside him. “And secondly, how stupid are you that you would run up and scream behind a blind person? Come on, that’s something even dumb people know. And thirdly, what could  _ possibly  _ be so amazing that you had to interrupt my work?”

The goddess rubbed the back of her head and chuckled awkwardly. “Well, now I’m embarrassed to say.”

“Hecate, I will throw your favorite shoes to Cerberus if you don’t start talking soon.” Threatened Thanatos. 

“Fine, fine.” She rolled her eyes at his threat. “Hades wants us to plan a party.” 

The god of death laughed. “Yeah, sure. What did he actually say?”

She shook her head. “No, that’s the thing. He really asked me to get you to help me throw a party. I’m scared. He’s never done something like this before. And you know what else?” She sat down in the wheelchair beside the hospital  bed. “I went to talk to him yesterday, and he was smiling. Just randomly, for no reason.”

Thanatos just stood there for a second, thinking. “Did someone trip in the parking lot?”

“Nope. And there weren’t even any frat boys around for him to curse with herpes. I’m telling you, he’s lost his mind this week.” She started rolling herself around the room in the wobbly old chair.

“Huh.”He was at a loss for words. “I guess we need to throw a party then. We had better get started as soon as possible.”

“Yep.” She stopped the chair for a moment. “Do you need me to leave now?”

“Yes.” He moved to the reap the old man, and then felt someone staring holes into his back. He turned and sighed. “Do you want me to push you down the hallway before you go?”

“YES!”

-

Hecate growled as her keys clattered to the floor. This was the third time she had tried to unlock the door with her hands full of grocery bags, and now she felt like cursing Hades for getting the new anti-teleportation charms on his apartment. “You accidently walk in on your boss naked  _ one time _ , and suddenly he restricts access to his house?! What kind of fresh hell is this?”

She had resorted to trying to kick down the door when it suddenly flew open, and she toppelled inside in a heap of limbs and irritation. She looked up to see Hades smirking down at her. 

“As fun as it is to watch you try and unlock a door; we are going to be busy today.” Hades grabbed the bags and waved her inside. “Come on, we have a lot to do.”

-

“...What fresh hell is this?” Hades muttered staring at the streamers attached to the vaulting ceiling. “Hecate!”

The goddess of magic strolled into his living room chewing her gum, and blew a bubble before answering. “What’s up, Boss Man?”

He pointed to the ceiling. “Explain this to me. Why are those paper monstrosities on my ceiling, and more importantly, why are they pink?” 

Right as he finished speaking, as if it had turned into a sentient being and had been insulted by his emphasis on the word pink, one of the blindingly hot pink streamers fell from the ceiling directly into his face. He slowly reached up to throw it off, disgust written across his face as he removed the offending object. 

Hecate’s eyes were huge and her breath was caught in her throat as she tried to contain her laughter. “Um...well. You said to throw a party, so these are part of that. Decor is an important part of any event.” 

Hades sighed as another streamer dropped towards his head. “And you decided hot pink was the right way to go, huh?”

“Well, I assumed that since you were throwing this party so spontaneously, you might want try something new.” She held her breath and her soul was filled with unvoiced laughter as yet another streamer fell from the ceiling. She crossed her fingers and hoped what she said next would work. By this point, she was rather fond of the near offendingley bright pink dive-bombing decorations. 

“I mean, I was talking with Hestia the other day, and she said pink was a young gods game these days. I thought you were cool with how young these decorations are.” She began pick up the rolls of paper as she delivered the killing blow. “Sorry, I guess I was totally wrong about you being okay with the pink.”

His mind was immediately swept up into a whirlwind of “Old and happy or young and irritated?” At that moment, his face was a thing of legend; it rivalled the confusion and contemplation of every confused reaction meme of the century. You could practically see the equations floating around his head.

He sighed. “Fine. I’ll allow it.” With an air of solemn finality the last streamer fell straight from the pinnacle of the soaring ceiling right across Hades’ less than impressed face. “With one condition. I need you make sure that these stupid things stay up where the belong.” 

At this point her big brown eyes were twitching with the effort she was exerting to contain her laughter. “Of course, sir. I wouldn’t dream of anything else.”

“And don’t forget to send out the invitations again!” With that parting comment he stalked from the room. 

 

-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long to post. I don't have a laptop at home, midterms are this week, and writers block just slapped me in the face in a half-hearted murder attempt. If you wanna ask questions, or just want to chat, my tumblr is theypanickedatthewrongdisco.


	6. Studying (or a failed attempt at it anyway)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Knowledge ABSORB

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh god, so many references. Help, I'm drowning in them.

Kore groaned from underneath her Intro to Criminology textbook. “Why is reading even a thing anymore? Why haven’t we perfected learning through osmosis yet?” She smashed her face against the tear ridden paper and started whispering. “Absorb the knowledge, brain.  _ Absorb. _ ”

Her roommate walked in, looked at her whispering to her book, and then walked out again. The goddess’ face started burning. “Oh Rhea, she saw me.”

She let the book drop to the floor and reached for her phone. She scrolled through her contacts until she found who she was searching for. 

 

_ hey. wyd _

 

~~_...why _ ~~

 

_ I kinda need some help _

 

~~_ with what tho _ ~~

 

_ pole dancing lessons. The instructor told  me that i needed a tutor _

 

~~_ really?! _ ~~

 

_ Oh Rhea, no. criminology is kicking my butt and i need help _

 

_ Hey _

 

_ Hey _

 

_ Hey _

 

_ HEYYYYYYY _

 

_ Answer meeeeeee _

 

_ Come overrrrrrrrr _

 

~~_ FINE _ ~~

 

~~_ Hold on, i’ll be there in a minute _ ~~

 

-

Kore glanced at the door as Aphrodite walked into her room. “Finally. It took you long enough.” She tossed her phone aside. “So, now that you’re here, can you throw me out of the window?”

Aphrodite grabbed a pillow and sat on the end of the bed. “Nah, it would mentally scar too many people. They’re already traumatized enough with midterms as it is.”

The younger goddess leaned over and started poking the other goddess in the leg. “What about the back window? Or maybe at night? No one would see that way. Trauma avoided!” Aphrodite slapped her hand away and kicked her leg.

“Okay, calm down edgelord. Let’s wait for finals to roll around for the window-yeeting to happen.” She groaned and leaned over to pull Kore’s textbook onto the bed with them. “C’mon, this is what you called me over here for, let’s do this.”

Suddenly a can of Redbull slowly rolled from under the bed. Kore carefully looked at Aphrodite. “I swear I don’t have an addiction.”

Her friend looked her for a second. “So, hypothetically, if I was to look under your bed, there wouldn’t be any more empty energy drink cans, right?”

The young goddess laughed nervously. “Of course not. That would be crazy.”

Aphrodite tucked her pink hair behind her ear. “This is for your own good. Promise.”

 

“...What?”

Suddenly the older goddess dove off of the bed and ripped the blankets away to reveal a stash of Redbull cluttering up the space under the bed. Kore’s yells of horrified protest were silenced by Aphrodite’s shocked responses. “Kore! You liar!” She started poking around under the bed. “Rhea, there’s so many cans down here. You need help.”

Kore groaned. “Look, I have a lot to do. This just helps me get it done.” She turned on her puppy eyes. “Please don’t take them away. This and coffee is how I‘ve stayed alive so long.”

Aphrodite kicked the cans away from herself. “Fine, but we’re going to regulate your intake. This isn’t healthy, even for a god.”

“Fair enough. Can I have one right now, though? I’m about to fall asleep.”

The older goddess gave her a look. “No. No more caffeine today. We’re going to study.”

“Ugh...can we at least keep the window death as a backup plan?”

“Obviously.”

-

“Oh, hey, Hades said to add this name to the guest list for tonight.” Said Thanatos as he handed Hecate a small piece of paper with a hastily scrawled name on it. “Apparently it’s ‘important that they get this, on pain of front row tickets to Tantalus’ stand-up comedy night.’” 

Hecate hummed as she took the paper. “Wow, he must be serious. He usually only uses that threat to keep restless spirits in line.” Her eyebrows raised in surprise as she read the name. 

“Hey,” She turned to Thanatos, tapping his arm. “Did you know what the name on here was?”

“Hecate, you are the dumbest smart person I know.” He tapped the paper. “If I could have read it, I would have.”

She gasped. “You can’t read?!” 

He blankly pointed to his eyes. “This is why I worry about you. You’ve know me for years, how do you not remember that I can’t see?”

“Oh. Shoot, that’s on me, my bad.” She absent-mindedly patted his hand. “But back to the point, guess who’s name is on here.” 

“Who?”

“That cute goddess who found Cerberus. Kore.”

-

Kore snapped abruptly out of sleep and into reality when she suddenly hit the floor. “What the-” She looked up and Aphrodite was sorting piles of clothing on her bed. “Did...did you just push me off the bed?”

The pure incredulity was obvious in her tone. 

“Yes. Yes I did.” There was an ounce of regret on Aphrodite’s face. She tossed an envelope to Kore. “This came while you were asleep. Now,” She sat down on Kore’s desk. “Can you explain why the Lord of the Dead is sending you a party invitation?”

“...what?” 

“Read the letter.”

Kore frowned and opened the envelope. The letter enclosed had the the invitation written on it, along with a date, time , and location. After further inspection, it did appear to be sent by Hades. She glanced over at Aphrodite and tossed the letter aside.  “Well,” She began. “I met him and his friends a couple of days aog and-”

Aphrodite cut her off. “Kore! Has your mother taught you nothing?! Hades is  _ literally _ the worst god you could possibly associate with! What happened to going on a date with Apollo?”

“Yeah, no that didn’t work out, I punched him in the dick.” Kore waved it off. “And just so you know, Hades and his friends were some of the friendliest, most respectful people I’ve met in a long time.”

“How did you end up meeting him, anyway?”

“Um, about that. So, his dog escaped, and I found it, but I didn’t know it was his dog, so I decided to keep it, but then we ran into Hecate and Thanatos, and then we went to Hades’ apartment, and then we drank, and now I guess he’s having a party and he sent me an invitation.” She was blue in the face by the time she her rather long rant.

Aphrodite blinked. “Uh...okay. GIve me a second to understand what you just said.¨ She took a second to breathe and think. “So. You found his dog, huh?” 

Kore nodded. “Yep”

“For some reason, I was expecting something more...I don’t know, exciting? I mean, isn’t it dangerous for such young goddess to hang out with?”

Kore rolled her eyes. “I don’t know why everyone keeps calling me such a young goddess. I’m really not that much younger than you.”

Aphrodite hmmed. “Yeah, it’s just habit at this point, I guess.”

Kore thought for a moment. “Eh, if he was gonna kill me, he would have done it when I was drunk. Any ways, he has a really nice butt, so I don’t really care.”

“I don’t know how to respond to you telling me the the most feared god in the pantheon has a nice butt.”

-

In the following hours, the conversation bounced from Aphrodite trying to convince Kore to go to the party, to Kore trying to tell Aphrodite that Hades wasn’t dangerous, and then to both of the arguing about how short a dress could be before it was considered a shirt. It was an extremely confusing three hours.

Finally, they both flopped down on the clothing covered floor. “Oh my god,” Whispered Kore. “It’s going to take so long to clean this. I’m going to die.”

Aphrodite rolled her eyes at her friends theatrics, then snapped her fingers and willed the room into order. “Do you just forget that you’re a god or…” 

“Sometimes...sometimes I don’t like you very much.” Kore stared at the ceiling like it was a map to the answers for all of her problems. “So, what do you think about this party? Do you think I should go?” 

“I mean, I would. But, you know, you’re an adult, you can make your own decisions now.” The older goddess looked at her phone. “Looks like the party is this weekend. That’s enough time to get a dress, and possibly a super cool tattoo.”

“No. I don’t like needles. They’re suspiciously bendy.” Kore stood sighing. “Well, if you can help me find a dress, then I guess I‘ll go.”  Aphrodite cheered from the floor.

 

-

Kore frowned as she tugged at the bottom of her dress. “Aphrodite, are you sure about this? This dress seems...kinda short.” Her words were directed to her friend who was fussing with Kore’s hair and jacket while the waited for a cab.

The other goddess moved hands away from the hem of her short hot pink dress. “Honey, it’s fine. You look amazing.” She slapped her on the butt and grinned manically. “Now, when you get to that party, I want you to walk in there and drag every single person through oceans of jealousy. And remember to call me if you don’t feel safe. And to make your own drink.”

“Yeah, yeah, I got it.”

The streetlights glinted off of her dress when the pink haired goddess spun her around to put her into the just-arrived cab. “Good luck sunshine!”

When the cab pulled away from the curb, Kore looked back at Aphrodite and began cackling. The older goddess was making weirdly complicated dirty hand motions and doing her best to shock everyone around her. 

She stuck her head out of the window to hear what her friend was yelling. 

Then she finally heard it. Vaguely, in the distance. “And if you are going to go through with this idea, you might as well try to bang the Lord of the Dead, I hear he can be a great lay!”

-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so, I've decided to have an update schedule for this fic, it will be once a week, on Thursdays or Fridays. That way, hopefully, the chapters will longer.  
> Okay my dudes, have a nice day and I'll see you next week.!


	7. Too much panic, not enough disco

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hecate’s eyes were huge and her breath was caught in her throat as she tried to contain her laughter. “Um...well. You said to throw a party, so these are part of that. Decor is an important part of any event.” 
> 
> Hades sighed as another streamer dropped towards his head. “And you decided hot pink was the right way to go, huh?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AAAHHHHHHH I'M SO EXCITED!!!! I've been working on this chapter for so long (at least that's how it feels to me lol) Okay, I read the latest chapter of Lore Olympus and DIED, and that will probably inspire a later chapter to be great  
> . Or a mess, we'll see.

Persephone’s eyes widened as the taxi pulled up to the venue. The bright blue neon lights coming from the windows of the penthouse on the top of the building shone into the darkness, a beacon to the eager party goers. “Alright. Let’s do this.” She whispered to herself. 

It was the most exclusive party in New York City, and the crush of people in line reflected that. The line of people waiting to get inside was completely wrapped around the corner, stretching for at least three blocks.

She stepped out of the taxi, slightly teetering on her five inch tall stilettos. The slightly anxious goddess took a breath and strode forward, shoulders back and head held high. 

The crowd of mortals parted around her as she walked forward, as if they could feel the power of a god walking in their midst. She smirked as she cut in line and handed the bouncer her invitation and I.D. “Crazy night, huh?” 

The bouncer laughed and handed her her I.D. back. “Yeah, it always is this time of year. Could be worse though, at least he invited fewer people this year.” He waved her inside. “Have a good night.”

She smiled and walked inside. “Yeah, you too.”

When she got inside, she stared in shock for a moment. “ _ This  _ is fewer people?!” The bass thudded through her chest, and the crush of people surrounding her moved in sync to the beat. 

Spotlights were everywhere, but the room still maintained a comfortable level of darkness. She jumped as a streamer fell from somewhere onto her shoulder, and snickered when she saw the hot pink. “Wow, Hades is a pink man, huh.” 

Someone behind her laughed and picked the streamer off of her. “Yeah, I might have had something to do with that.” 

Persephone grinned when she turned around to see Hecate tying the streamer in a bow around her shaven head. “Really going for the whole pink look, huh?” The streamer on her Hecate’s head now matched the other ones tied around her neck, waist, arms, and legs. They completely covered her body, trailing down on the floor behind her like she was a crazy hobo lady defending her turf with pure insanity.

The taller goddess smiled. “Yeah, boss man told me that I had to make sure that these stayed up, but…” She gestured with her streamer laden hands. “As you can see, it didn’t really work out too well, so I’m trying pick all of these up so he doesn’t see.”

Persephone snickered. “He’s really that worried about it? Wow, that’s rough.” Hecate nodded as another streamer fell down and landed delicately on Persephone’s shoulder.

“Yeah, I guess that there’s someone here he wants to impress, because he’s never  allowed streamers before.” She grabbed the streamer and motioned for Persephone to turn around. “Here,” She said, tying the offendingley pink object around her neck. “Don’t say I never gave you nothing.”

The young goddess blinked “...Okay, I guess? Do you need any help picking the rest of them up?”

Hecate waved her off. “Nah, I got this. Just don’t let Hades see the new ribbon, and go have fun!” And with one last adjustment to her (quite frankly ridiculous) new choker, she was  gone.

“Huh.” Persephone shrugged and headed off to get a drink. 

-

She leaned over the crowded kitchen counter to the happy-looking guy pouring drinks for the crowd. “Hey, do you know how to make a whiskey sour?” 

The guy looked at her and then laughed and took a swing out of his cup. “Kid, I can make any drink in the book. In fact,” He said as he began pouring whiskey into a plastic cup. “I invented most of them.” The bartender handed her the glass. “Here you go. Have fun, kiddo.”

She smiled at the bartender and turned to leave. RIght as she took her first step, she ran face first into someone an stumbled backwards, drink spilling and leaving a sticky mess all over the floor. Right as she completely lost her balance, a pair of hands reached out and pulled her steady.

“Hey, you know, as much as I like seeing you, maybe we should stop literally running into each other.” Hades grinned down at her.

She blushed as he pulled his hands away, seemingly unbothered by the alcohol she had spilled on him. “Sorry, I’ll try not to make it a habit.” She suddenly realized that she still had the pink streamer necklace on, and that she was supposed to be avoiding Hades for Hecate’s sake. “Well, it’s been nice seeing you, but I should really be-”

She was cut off by Hades’ snickers. “She got you to help with the streamers, didn’t she.” He carefully reached over and untied the streamer from around her neck. “Don’t worry about it, she always blows things up in her mind to be worse than they actually are.”

“So, you’re not going to fire her over the failed streamer attempt?” She teased. “I thought you were supposed to be the mean god.”

He gasped and laid his hand over his chest. “How could you make such false accusations? I’m not supposed to be the mean god, I  _ am _ the mean god.”

She giggled at his overdramatic speech. “Okay, okay, fine. Your majesty, I officially acknowledge your right to the title of bitchiest god in the pantheon.” 

“Thank you, thank you, it was an honor to win this award.” He smiled at her for a moment. “Oh, I just realized that I made you spill your drink. Could I get you another?”

She waved him off. “Nah, it’s fine. I probably shouldn’t be drinking to much anyways.”

Hades shrugged and and drank from his own glass. “Hey, as long as you’re here, I should introduce you to some people.” He took her hand and tugged her into the crowd, searching for the people he had specifically invited just for this. It was time to help her meet some potential boyfriends.

-

Persephone groaned playfully as the green-haired dryad she was speaking to told another stupid joke. “Please stop, I don’t know how many more of these I can take.” 

Hades snickered beside her. “That’s what she said.” He just laughed harder when they both flipped him off. “Oh come on, that was good. You people just don’t appreciate a great joke.”

When Persephone went back to her conversation with the nymph, Hades zoned out, completely caught up in his thoughts. So far, his plan was working. Everyone he had introduced to Persephone, she had gotten along with. Even that one weird person that he had accidentally introduced her to she had gotten along with.

He was pulled out of his thoughts by Persephone poking him repeatedly in his chest. She looked extremely mischievous. He squinted suspiciously down at her. “What did you do?”

She rolled her eyes. “I didn’t do anything, old man. I was just going to ask you to dance.”

“Oh.” Well, this was unexpected. “Um, sure, yeah, let’s go.” A little dancing wouldn’t hurt his plan, right?

-

They had been dancing for hours, and the party was now hitting new highs. People were dancing on tables, and some nymphs were doing body shots in the kitchen. Somehow, Persephone had ended up sharing an entire bottle of whipped raspberry vodka with Hades as they danced, and it was nearly gone, the smallest amount of liquid barely sloshing around in the bottom. 

Slowly, throughout the night the bass had been rising steadily - pounding through the party, pulling their energy ever higher and higher. At this point, the night had become a whirlwind of dancing and laughter. All of their problems were temporarily forgotten while they danced in the bright, flashing lights.

After finishing the vodka, Persephone and Hades stopped dancing momentarily, they decided that they simply could  _ not _ keep dancing without more alcoholic assistance. They left the dance floor to find another bottle, and ended up cheering on a beer pong competition in the kitchen. 

“Chug, chug, chug, chug- yES!!!” Persephone screamed along with the rest of the crowd. She turned to Hades. “Are your parties always this crazy?!”

He grinned at her as he picked up a bottle of whiskey. “No, the party seems to be particularly...lively this year.”

“Whew, it’s hot in here.” She began fanning herself. “Do you have a bathroom?” 

“Yeah, it’s downstairs. Do you need me to show you?” 

“Nah, I got it.”

-

She sang along to Post Malone as she walked down the hallway, completely in her own world. Unfortunately, she wasn’t the best multitasker, as the singing and walking at the same time tripped het up. Even worse, she had just reached the stairs, and was now nose-diving straight down to the next floor. 

“Ugh.” She winced as she sat up, the pain in her ankle overpowering any other injuries that she might have sustained. She looked down at her quickly swelling ankle. “Oh, this can’t be good.”

 

Her hypothesis was proven correct when she carefully prodded at her ankle. “Ah!” The pain in her ankle exploded at her touch, completely overloading her mind with body-wracking pain. She gritted her teeth and tried to keep her grasp on reality but her battle with the blurry darkness at the edge of her vision was eventually lost as another wave of pain wracked her body. 

 

-

Hades smiled as he handed Hecate a beer. “It’s going pretty well, if I do say so myself.”

“I mean yeah, your parties always do- _ oooohhhhh _ !” Hecate wiggled her eyebrows at him. “Is she seduced? Have you proposed yet? I wonder if a spring wedding would be cute or corny.”

“Just for that, I’m taking this.” He reached over and snatched her beer away. “And I’m not trying to get into her pants or anything. I just wanna see if she’s comfortable interacting with these kinds of people.”

“Out of all that you could have come up with, this isn’t your worst one.”

“I’m not sure if that’s a compliment or criticism, but I’ll just pretend that you’re being nice.”

She laughed and took her drink back. “Okay, you do that.”

-

Kore groaned when she woke up on the floor. Her head felt like it was splitting apart, but even worse than that was the agonizing lightning that was shooting through her ankle. She tried to move but the pain flashed through her ankle again, so she decided to assess her situation from her current position.  

She had fallen down the staircase, and in doing so had twisted her ankle and hit her head. Kore began to look through her options. She could try to heal herself, but that probably wouldn’t end well as she never paid attention when the process was being explained to her by her mother. She could try to crawl upstairs to get help, but that could result in even worse injuries. Suddenly it hit her.

Hades had given her his number a few days ago, she could just text him and he could help her. 

She gingerly shifted to reach her phone, cursing the combination of high heels and alcohol that had make this disaster possible. Kore began to quietly curse to herself when her ankle began to hurt even more as she scrolled through her contacts, searching for Hades’ name.

Kore would have begun crying in relief when she finally found his name, if she wasn’t already crying from her (probably) broken ankle.

_ Hey its kore i fell down the stairs can u come help _

-

Hades looked at his phone and frowned. “Hecate, I have to go. If you video Thanatos twerking on the table again, don’t post it anywhere.”

_ I’m on my way, hold on. _

-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh. My God. NaNoWriMo almost killed me. I was writing and then realized that the ENTIRE storyline didn't make sense so I had to rewrite and trash a lot of it. I contemplated orphaning the work, faking my death, and then moving to an alpaca farm in south america to live a new, yet simple life, but I thought that that would be rude so. Here I am. 
> 
> If you have questions or suggestions, leave them in the comments section, or come exchange some mutual hating of your own writing at my tumblr theypanickedatthewrongdisco
> 
> Also, if anyone would like to beta for me and help me get these chapters up quicker, that would be great. 
> 
> See you next week lovelies!!!


	8. Jello, more like Hello

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And with that, they began running into rooms and leaving jello. They didn’t just leave it on a table or nightstand though. That was too mainstream. What they would do was literally the most complicated plan that they could come up with, short of twerking the jello into the patients rooms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this chapter is a bit shorter that normal, but finals are killing me, so I guess you'll just have to deal

By the time Hades had teleported them to the hospital, Kore’s face had been drained of all color. She kept trying to ask him why he didn’t just heal her ankle himself, but he was freaking out so much that she couldn’t get a word in edgewise until after he had brought them to the hospital. 

Kore had to admit that it was kind of funny to see the normally oh-so-composed Lord of the Underworld so flustered. When they had appeared in the emergency room, Hades had grabbed the nearest doctor and dispassionately said,  “If you don’t fix her, I will cut your dick off and skin it like a pineapple.” The man’s face had drained of blood thoroughly that he looked like one of Hades’ spirits, but he had gotten the job done. 

Ten minutes later, Kore’s foot was wrapped and they were sitting cross legged on the bed playing rock-paper-scissors. They were mid-game when a smiling nurse walked in with a platter holding jello cups. It was all giggles and farts until they both reached for the only cup of red jello. Slowly they turned and began glaring at each other. 

“Don’t. You. Dare.”  Hades threatened. 

But Kore gave him the biggest, saddest puppy eyes she could manage and whimpered. “But my ankle is hurt.” He sighed and handed the jello over in defeat. 

“So, question.” Kore asked. Hades shrugged his okay and she continued. “Well, you’re pretty old, and I was just wondering - how much of your mind have you lost to old age already because you could have totally healed my ankle at your house. And yet...we’re at a mortal hospital.” 

Hades cleared his throat and blushed. “Ah - yeah. I was hoping you would be too  drunk to remember that.” He began to unconsciously scrub his feet on the floor as he continued. “I was a bit tipsy, and -”

Kore almost fell off of the bed as she cackled. “A  _ bit? _ Son, you were drunker than I was! Don’t even play that way with me.”

“Okay. Maybe I was a  _ little _ bit drunk.”

“And maybe my ankle is a  _ little  _ broken.”

He groaned and pushed his hair out of his face. “Okay, so, yes, I was very drunk, and then I saw your ankle and freaked out and forgot that I could fix it. Are you happy now?”

“Yeah. It’s not everyday that you can get the Lord of the Dead to admit that he panics about broken ankles.” She said. “Speaking of which, how do you feel about fixing it now?”

“I’ll fix it, but we’re going to need to ask for more jello first.”

“Oh yeah, good idea.”

-

After Hades healed her ankle, they snuck down to the cafeteria and stole all of the jello that they could carry. Their giggles echoed up and down the hall as they carried their newly-acquired treasure, with the containers in their hands, in their pockets, a few containers had even been shoved down Hades’ pants. (Those containers had been relegated specifically to him)

Kore suddenly stopped and grabbed Hades’ sleeve. “Wait! Hold on.” She nodded to the rooms in the hallway. “What if they want jello too? We need to give out some jello, everyone deserves this weird jiggly happiness.”

Hades turned and looked at her. “Kore, you’re right. We can’t let these people suffer in a jello-less world.” He looked off into the distance behind her. “We need to do the right thing.”

And with that, they began running into rooms and leaving jello. They didn’t just leave it on a table or nightstand though. That was too mainstream. What they would do was literally the most complicated plan that they could come up with, short of twerking the jello into the patients rooms.

They would open the door, scream “It’s jello, fools!” and then do their best to throw the jello at the patients faces.

Understandably, when the doctors found two grown people throwing jello at sick people, no matter their intentions, they weren’t to happy. Hades and Kore ended up running out of the hospital with their hands full of jello, and Kore almost twisted her ankle again while they were running for Hades’ car.

“Oh wow.” Kore was grinning at her jello stash as they drove off. “We did it! We stole from the rich, and gave to the poor. Viva la revolution!”

Hades stuck his head out of the window and began to yell at the cars around them. Kore only caught bits of it, but what she caught was “-uck yeah, jello” and “Your mom can-”. She was about to ask him what that last one meant, but then she had to grab his shirt and pull him back inside that car when he almost crashed them into another car.

“Hey! Pay attention to the road, idiot.” Kore frowned and plugged the aux cord into her phone. “Just for that, I get to pick the music.”

She turned up the music and they began to headbang on the drive to her dorm.

-

Kore woke up in her bed with a pounding headache. “Oh Rhea, I’m dying.” Her own voice, even in  quiet whisper, tore through her head and inflamed her already throbbing head. She gingerly patted around her on her bed until she found her phone.

_ Hey. i might be dead nbd _

 

~~_...i mean _ ~~

 

~~_ Mood _ ~~

 

~~_ But why r u dying _ ~~

 

_ I drank a lot at that party last nigh _

 

_ *night lol _

 

_ And then i broke my ankle _

 

_ And then hades took me to a hospital where we stole jello _

 

_ And then he took me home but there was some kind of alcohol in his car so we finished it and now i think i need to jump out of my window and end it all _

 

~~_ I’ll be there in like 5 mins hold on im gonna get coffee _ ~~

 

-

Aphrodite grinned as she walked into Kore’s room. “Soooooo, I heard someone had a fun time last night!” She began to noisily move things around on the desk as she chattered. 

Kore whimpered and buried her head under her pillow. “Oh dear gods, please just be quiet. I’m begging you.”

“Nope.” Aphrodite plopped down on Kore’s bed as handed her coffee. “It’s your own fault for getting drunk, so that you have hangover isn’t  really my problem.”

“Wow, and you wanna know why you don’t have any other friends. You should have people just begging to hang around you with that attitude.” Kore grinned at her friend from over her cup. “That’s on you my dude.”

“You know what, just for that comment, I’m going to make your already horrible day even worse.” She leaned in, smiling like the devil herself, and whispered,  _ “You have class in 20 minutes.” _

The stripper life began to look more and more appealing by the second.

-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Again, no beta, so hit me up if there are mistakes, or it doesn't make sense. Kudos and comments actually make me write quicker, so leave em here.
> 
> If you want talk ask questions or even just yell about the Avengers: Endgame trailer, you can find me on tumblr at theypanickedatthewrongdisco


	9. Fuck it, I guess he's gonna propose now

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Anna. There is literally nothing on this earth that could kill you. Death took one look at you and ran screaming.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! So, a few things have been pointed out to me, and I thought I would put them here so you guys would know! So, in this universe, mortals do NOT know about the gods. Like, at ALL. The gods know of each other, and most of them have met, but a few just have never seen each other due to various reasons.

December 12, 1996

Anna grinned as they spun across the room, walking on air with the music singing in their bones. Her had begun falling from it’s carefully coiffed updo moments before they had started dancing, and now it was slowly making its way from its prison of bobby pins and hairspray. Her partner laughed and brushed the hair from her face. “Hmm, we can’t have those pretty eyes of yours cover up, now can we.”

The woman rolled her eyes and gently pushed his hands away, smiling despite herself. “You’re being ridiculous again, you know that right?”

He put his hand over his heart in a mockery of shock. “What? Me, Thomas Carslyle, ridiculous? I never.” He laughed as she swatted at him again, and their dance continued across the floor uninterrupted.

“Thomas, you couldn’t stop being ridiculous if your life depended on it.” She smiled at him, completely happy for now, because in this moment, in this one beautiful moment, she had forgotten all of her problems. Everything that had pushed them to the towards the old house where they were dancing, was erased for as long as they were kept moving.

The wood creaked under them as they moved. It made her miss her old home, full of warmth and contentment, and not a single creaking floorboard in the entire house. She couldn’t really say that she was happier there, though. It had been a perfectly lovely life, but it had not been what she wanted. It hadn’t had this. 

Immortality had its perks, sure, but sometimes it was hard for her to breathe. It was stifling in its eternity, crushing in all its endless years. She felt like she hadn’t been able to take a breath for her entire life, until she had left everything that she knew. 

She had done the unthinkable. She had done what so few people had done before, and had traded her immortality for a human life, a mortal one. And when she had, gods, she had felt everything like never before. Emotions ran wild in this human form, and she had thrown herself into them wholeheartedly, embracing how they made her feel.

And then, something unexpected happened. She had met him. Thomas. They had met what felt like eternities ago, and they had become friends instantly. Somehow that friendship had slowly turned into something else, and now they had been dating for two years.

They were on their way to see her parents. Anna hadn’t deen them in years, and Tom had never met them. The only downside to being mortal, was that she could no longer just instantly appear where she wanted. No, she had to take trips like everyone else. 

That was how she and Tom had ended up staying in an old house that his family owned, but had long ago abandoned. The next day they would be on a bus to New York, where she would be taking him to meet her parents. 

The sun was finally setting, but she could hardly pay attention to that for watching the storm clouds gathering in the sky. They were rolling in quickly, obscuring the little remaining sunlight. The storm was all blacks and greys, lit up only by the blinding white shrieks of lightning. 

“Hey, Tom, it’s starting to look a little crazy out there. Are you sure this house is safe?” Anna said.

He rolled his eyes. “Anna, would I ever take you anywhere that wasn’t safe? C’mon now, this house has been here for years, I don’t think one more storm is gonna hurt it.”

Anna rolled her eyes and poked him in the side. “Fine, but if your creepy old house kills me, I’m gonna haunt you forever.”

“Anna. There is literally nothing on this earth that could kill you. Death took one look at you and ran screaming.”

-

Anna was ripped from sleep by a crack of particularly loud thunder. The storm seemed to be getting closer and closer. She just hoped that it would pass around them, because no matter what Tom said, she still wasn’t sure if this old house would stand if the storm hit them with it’s full force. 

She looked over at Tom. She loved that boy with everything in her, but she was worried about when he met her parents. What would he do after she told him what her parents are, and what she used to be? Would he even believe her? And if he did, the would he stay?

It was times like this that she almost wished that she was still a goddess, and she could fix these problems with a wave of her hand. She sighed. 

“What happens, happens.” She whispered to herself. “It’ll be okay.”

-

The next time she woke up, it was because she couldn’t breathe. She gasped awake struggling to catch her breath in the smoke filled air. “Tom?!” She couldn’t see him, the smoke was too thick, she couldn’t even take a breath without coughing. 

She dropped to the floor, desperately crawling as she tried to find him. “Tom, where are you?”

Anna couldn’t see him, where was he? He had been right beside her last night, where could he have gone? 

She was having trouble concentrating. There was a creaking noise and suddenly a burning wooden beam fell where she had been only moments before. She was crying now, and she had turned to keep searching for Tom, when suddenly she felt something. 

It was Tom, collapsed on the floor, skin blue and covered in blisters.

She grabbed his arm and began pulling. She had to get them out of there, time was running out. 

The fire was spreading rapidly now, and tears were streaming down her face as she pulled Tom down the stairs. “Tom, I need you to wake up now, okay? I need you to get up, we have to go!”

Suddenly, there was a crash and the stairs underneath her gave away. 

When she came to, her legs were trapped underneath a pile of boards, and the fire was growing closer. She saw Tom’s hand and grabbed it. “Tom! Wake up! This isn’t funny, wake u-” 

He groaned and made to stand and then fell back to the floor. “Ah, my head. What’s…” He trailed off, eyes widening as he took in their surroundings. 

Anna was trapped underneath a pile of wood, and the flames were growing closer. They could barely breathe, he would need to get her out of here quickly before the smoke did permanent damage.

“Hey, hold on baby I’m gonna get you out of here, okay. Just hang on.”

“Tom.”

“Just give me a second.” He was doing his best to get her out, but to no avail.

“Tom.” She pulled on his arm. “Tom, just listen to me. There’s no time to get me out. You need to go.”

“Anna, I’m not leaving you here. Now hold on, I’m gonna get you out.”

She coughed into her shirt, her lungs barely able to take in any oxygen at this point. “Tom, please. I need you to go.”

“I’m no going anywhere.” He was still doing his best to get her free. 

“Just go!”

He turned around to her, eyes red from the smoke. “No! I will not leave you here! Now let me help you!”

The fire crept ever closer, and her heart sank. She knew how stubborn he could be. She knew he wouldn’t leave her there, no matter how much she screamed or plead. Her eyes met his, and she could see that he was realizing what she already knew. That they were going to die there, in that little wooden house. 

She grabbed his hand. “Tom- Tom, I don’t wanna go. I don’t wanna die.”

“Hey, hey, hey.” He smoothed the hair away from her ash stained forehead and tucked it behind her ear. “It’s gonna be okay. We’re gonna get out, alright.”

“No we’re no-”

He cut her off quickly. “Hey love, I know that this couldn’t be a worse time, but there’s something I need to ask you.” He dug around in his pocket, and pulled out a small box. “Will you marry me?”

For a moment the only sound was the fire roaring around them and the storm raging outside. Then she was nodding yes and he was putting the ring on her finger and pulling her in close. “I’m sorry Anna. I’m so sorry, I shouldn’t have brought you here.”

She shook her head and laced their fingers together one last time. “Darling, it’s not your fault.”

Right before the house collapsed, she smiled wanly  over at Tom. “Looks like I get to beat you in this game too.” She closed eyes, trying to pretend that this whole thing was just a bad dream. “I’ll see you when we wake up, okay?”

He sobbed, and their world burned.

-

Astraeus carefully placed the flowers by the tree. Eos pulled him down on the ground beside her, and they lay there for a while, dreaming of better times. 

The sky was cold and grey, and the earth itself looked as if it were mourning with them; full of sharp edges and muted life. They came here every year to visit their daughter, and since her body had never been recovered, they paid their respects at the foot of their daughters favorite tree. If you looked closely at the trunk of the tree, you could see a name carved into the wood.

_ Anna _

The wind sighed around them. Eos finally spoke up, breaking into the silence. “I think Anna would have really like her. They would have have been great friends.”

“I know. I wish that they could have meet.” He said quietly.

Eos shifted against the tree. The wind was picking up, and it was steadily getting colder. “We can’t let her fall victim to the same fate, Astraeus. We may not be her parents, but we’re sure close enough.” 

“We’ll keep her safe. We won’t make the same mistake with Kore. That girl is going to live, even if I have to sell my soul to make it happen.” Astraeus laced his fingers with hers. “To whatever end?”

“To whatever end.”

-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oof, yeah. So. Just in case it wasn't clear, I thought I would give a quick explanation. Anna was Atraeus and Eos' daughter, but she died after she gave up her immortality to be with a mortal. And now, A+E are saying some pretty cryptic stuff about keeping Kore alive.
> 
> Sorry about the sadness, but this should be the most angsty chapter in the whole fic, so at least it's over. More fluff to come. 
> 
> As always, if u have any questions, concrit, or just wanna yell about Lore Olympus. hmu on tumblr at theypanickedatthewrongdisco 
> 
> See you next time, u funky lil readers


	10. And Now, Back To Our Regularly Scheduled Programming

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He ran his hand through his hair when he arrived at the throne room door. He had been here countless times throughout the years, and walking into the throne room still scared him. He hid any emotion in his eyes. Might as well let them see what they believe. He walked in.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Strikethrough is Aphrodite, italics is Kore
> 
> Now remember kids, that for the most part, the gods are just total dicks (especially zeus, lol)

Hades hummed along to the radio as he got out of bed. Today was going to be a long day for him. He had his normal duties, as well as a meeting on Olympus with his family. He shook his head and started going through his closet. He and his family had never been close, and meetings like this were always tense.

“Hey, bossman.” Hecate walked into his room and tossed a box at his head. “I got you a doughnut for breakfast, since you never want to eat before you go to family meetings.”

Hades smiled. “Thanks Hecate. What would I do without you?”

She walked over and pushed him away from the closet. “Wear ugly clothes, apparently.”

Hades laid a hand over his chest and gasped overdramatically. “What a horrible and quite frankly hurtful accusation to make. I don’t know if I can ever recover from this shock!” He flopped back onto his bed as she held up outfit options.

“Well, maybe not _ugly_ clothes, but definitely inappropriate for what’s essentially a business meeting.”

“I mean, it’s not like I go to stuff like this all the time. Just every couple of years.”

She waved him off and threw an outfit at him. “Yeah, yeah, just admit that you’re too old to keep up with fashion and be done with it.”

“Fine! I admit it, I’m old and tired. I just wanna stay home and eat soup and watch Netflix with you and Thanatos; please help me fake a sickness so I don’t have to go.”

“Nope. Now go get dressed.” She drug him off the bed and started pushing him to bathroom.

-

Kore sat at her desk, staring into the distance and absentmindedly kicking the chair in front of her as her Criminology professor droned on. She couldn’t focus. Day dreams centered on food kept drifting in and out of her mind, making it nigh impossible to pay attention to her professor.

At least there was a reason that she was having such weird food fantasies. She had been assigned an essay in this class two weeks ago, and hadn’t even started it until the morning before it was due. That horrible decision had resulted in her not eating for over twenty four hours, and she was pretty sure that her stomach was doing it’s best to eat it’s way to her spine.

Suddenly the kid in front of turned and stared at her with the eyes of a dead man. “Kick my seat again and I will boil your bones.”

Kore might be a goddess, but she was so unnerved by what the guy in front of her said that she literally did not know how to respond. What do you even say to something like that? She made a mental note to never sit behind the bone-boiler again, and dug out her phone to text this unsettling situation to Aphrodite.

 

_Yo_

_Wanna hear a creepy threat_

 

~~_No, not really_ ~~

 

_Well im telling u anyways_

_I will boil your bones_

 

~~_…_ ~~

~~_Yeah okay that is actually creepy_ ~~

~~_Where did u even hear that_ ~~

_I wasn’t paying attention and was kicking this dudes seat and then he just looked me dead in the eyes and said that_

_I mean i shouldn’t have kicked his seat but like y so intense should i run screaming_

 

~~_Lol yeah probably_ ~~

~~_Hey im coming over after my last class today, do u wanna go get pizza_ ~~

 

_Do u not know me at all like when have i ever said no to pizza_

-

The sound of shoes on marble floors sounded off of the huge ceiling, and the noise pulled the bystanders attention to the man making the sound. Hades unconscious scowl grew deeper and darker as more and more people began to look at him. Even after all these thousands of years, almost everyone on Olympus was still afraid of him.

 _This is why I never come here_ , he thought to himself. Even his so-called family would back away from him when he visited, no matter how friendly he tried to be. After a while, he just stopped trying. They wouldn’t accept him as part of the family, so he had went and make his own family.

A tiny smile tugged at the edge of his mouth. Thanatos and Hecate. What would he do without them around, he wondered.

He ran his hand through his hair when he arrived at the throne room door. He had been here countless times throughout the years, and walking into the throne room still scared him. He hid any emotion in his eyes. Might as well let them see what they believe. He walked in.

The throne room was about the same as always. Twelve seats, each for one of the most powerful gods to exist. Zeus sat in his seat, as loud and arrogant as the storms he controlled. To his right sat Hera, and her smile was just as much of a lie as her marriage to the Lord of the Sky.

Next after Hera came the twins, Apollo and Artemis. He could tolerate Artemis, but he had never been able to stand the sun god. There was something in in his smile that screamed not to trust him; that his bright light held only pain and greed.

After the twins came Aphrodite and Dionysus. They were probably the only ones in the whole room the he felt any semblance of camaraderie towards. He had seen past her sweet, constantly lovestruck facade and underneath it was the mind of a battlescarred general. He could respect what she did to stay on the council; the Goddess of Love was more manipulative and vindictive than most would believe.

Dionysus was another story. He was the families resident stoner and bartender; and as such, he did his best to get along with everyone on the council.

The last god on the right was Demeter. The Goddess of the Harvest. She had a temper with a fuse shorter than she was, and apparently she had passed it on to her daughter. He and Demeter didn’t get along, but they each held a grudging respect for the other.

He took his seat and nodded to his brothers. On Zeus’ left sat Poseidon, God of the Sea, and next sat Hades himself. After Hades sat Athena, Goddess of Wisdom and Weaving, and her grey eyes looked so tired that he almost didn’t recognize her.

Athena sat next to Ares, the God of War. He had always been full of anger and life, but his face only held sorrow now, as if the mortals constant warring was draining him instead of fueling him. Ares and Athena spoke softly to each other, and from what Hades heard it sounded like peace was being planned for, and not war.

The last god in the room was Hermes, young and full of joy in this modern world where communication was so valued.

As always, Hades was the last one to arrive. The meeting began and he leaned back in his seat. It was going to be a long day, and he already wanted to go home.

-

Aphrodite sighed as she left the meeting on Olympus. Even though she was on of the most loved goddesses, the meetings were always exhausting. She walked towards her car and rummaged through her bag, pulling out her phone.

She hit the first number on recent calls and and waited.

The voice that answered the phone was irritated and abrupt. “What?”

“Hey, Kore, I’m in the neighborhood and I just wanted to know if you wanted to get some food or something. It’s been a long day, y’know?”

“Same. If you wanna grab pizza and come to my dorm, that’s cool, but I really don’t feel like putting on pants right now.”

Aphrodite laughed. “I feel it. Okay, I’ll be there in a few.”

-

Aphrodite rolled her eyes and grabbed another piece of pizza. “Well if you hate the class so much, why are you still taking it?”

“Because I love the subject, the teacher is just so _horrible._ ” Kore gestured wildly with her pizza. “Like, he literally just reads the textbook to the class, and he won’t answer any questions. And then he puts things that _he never explained_ on the test!” She glared malevolently at her textbook.

“Well, why don’t you get a tutor?” Asked Aphrodite.

“Is there even anyone who tutors people in criminology? Like, besides really bored retired cops?”

“I’m sure there are, you just have to find them.” She handed Kore another box of pizza. “Hey, you know that coffee shop that you’re always at? Sometimes people put up those fliers asking for tutors, maybe you should try doing that.”

“Huh. That...might actually work.”

-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shoutout to Nobloa for the help this week! I totally missed a major plot hole and they quite helpfully pointed it out to me!
> 
> Wow, this was a quick update! I've been getting so many positive reviews lately that this chapter just flew by. Thank everyone for the comments and kudos guys, it means a lot to me! 
> 
> So you next week lovelies!!!


	11. Look, sometimes you just have to get the Lord of the Dead to tutor you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He glanced up to see Kore trying her absolute best not to laugh in his face. “So. We collide again. I thought that the important gods were a lot more graceful than this.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...I swear that this chapter was harder to write than it looks

A hush fell over the baristas as Kore walked into the coffee shop. A sort of terrified awe was in the eyes of the cashier, and behind him two other employees slowly pulled out a sheet of paper with marks for a betting pool written on it. They remembered her, and it seemed that she had made a strong impression on them.

“Hi, welcome to the Ravens Nest, how can I help you today?”

Kore hummed and rocked back onto her feet. “Oh, hi Joe, it’s nice to see you again.” She smiled at the terrified boy. “What do you have that’s full of caffeine and chocolate? Like, just basically caffeinated chocolate syrup. Is that an option?”

Joe pointed to the menu behind him. “Um, we have- we have- a- there’s white mocha double chocolate chip, and it- it- it has a lot of caffeine in it.” The poor boy could barely stutter his way through the sentence. 

“Okay, sounds good. Just put some caffeine pills in it and it’ll be a perfect day.”

“Um, that’ll be $6.50. And what’s the name for the order?” 

It’s Kore. With a K.” She handed him the money and they began to make her drink.

“Have a nice day, ma’am.”

“You too.” Kore wandered over to the back wall to wait for her drink, and then noticed the chalkboard hanging in the middle of all the posters advertising cover bands. Written on the board was different names and subjects thrown together into a chaotic pile of garbage. 

“Hey, what’s this stuff on this board mean?” She yelled towards the front.

“It’s different tutors and the subjects that they teach.” Yelled back the cashier. “Also, your drink is ready whenever you are.” 

Kore flounced to the counter and grabbed her drink, completely unaware of the stares she was getting from the other customers. Apparently they weren’t used to people yelling in that shop.

She claimed a tabled near the window and emptied her backpack onto it. It was study time.

-

Hades rubbed his temples and walked into the cafe. It had been a horrible day, just as frustrating as it was long; and he was pretty sure if he didn’t get some kind of caffeinated assistance soon he wasn’t going to make it. He tugged Cerberus with him as he approached the counter. “Come on, Cerberus. Maybe we can get you a treat too.”

The cashier, already exhausted from dealing with Kore, saw the giant dog with Hades and decided that he wanted to die, right then and there. “Hi, how can I help you?” He ignored the others employees motioning at him to tell Hades about the no dogs allowed policy. He was just too done.

“Large caramel macchiato, thanks.”

A few minutes later Hades grabbed his drink and glanced around the room. Near the window were two big, comfortable looking armchairs that were calling his name, so he and Cerberus made a beeline straight for them. In his hurry to get to the chairs before anyone else did, he bumped into someone’s table.  The bump in resulted in knocking several books off the other persons table. “Sorry, apologies, let me get those.”

He glanced up to see Kore trying her absolute best not to laugh in his face. “So. We collide again. I thought that the important gods were a lot more graceful than this.” She said, pointing at her books on the ground. 

Hades carefully sat her books back on the table. “It was the dog.”

She fake gasped in horror. “What?! How dare you blame you clumsiness on this beautiful animal! It most definitely was not his fault.”

“It was Cerberus. Look how guilty he’s acting. He knows what he did.” In Cerberus’ defense, he ate a lot of shoes and had decided to look guilty all the time to avoid the dreaded spray bottle. 

Who would ever spray that cute face, honestly.

She rolled her eyes and pointed to the chair across from her. “Look, I enjoy arguing as much as the next goddess, but it’s hurting my neck to look so far up to see you face. Sit.”

He sat. “Wow. This is a lot of textbooks.” Hades started flipping through them. “Just looking at these is causing me depression.” 

She snorted. “Yeah, imagine having to remember all of that.” Kore pointed to her coffee. “That’s why I drink so much coffee. More espresso, less depresso.”

He peered over at her cup. “Is that even espresso?”

“I’ve drank so much caffeine that I can barely focus my eyes, much less remember what’s in this cup.”

He leaned back in his seat, nodding seriously. “Of course, that’s obviously a healthy coping mechanism. Caffeine overdose.”

“Hey, look, this is hard to do. The coffee is the only thing getting me through it.”

“Is it the teacher, or the subject?”

She blinked“...What? Of course it’s the teacher, I love this subject.”

He began to absentmindedly pet Cerberus. “Does he just read from the textbook?”

“Yep. Like, why am I even paying for this class when I could just buy the textbook and teach the class as well as he does myself. How am I supposed to learn this if he won’t explain anything or answer questions?”

“Have you considered getting a tutor?”

“Yeah, that’s why I’m here.” She waved to the corkboard covered in papers. “I was looking for a criminology tutor, but there weren’t any, so…”

Hades glanced over at her. “Could I help? I have a couple millenia of experience with the subject, you know.”

“Really? You would help?”

“Of course. I take payment in the form of brownies.”

“You won’t want the ones that I make. They always turn out in this weird mixture of both burnt to cinders and soggy.”

“Good to know. I’ll wave the fee.” He winked. ”Just this once.” He laughed into his coffee when she flipped him off. 

Kore glanced at her books and groaned. “Oh Rhea. Please tell me that you can help soon, because I don’t know how long I can do this alone.”

He grabbed one of her books and flipped it open. “Well, I happen to have some time available right now, if you want.” 

“Awesome. Also, in case you weren’t aware,” She pointed to a sign on the front door. “No pets are allowed in here.”

Hades winced. “That’s why the baristas have been staring and whispering, huh.”

“Yep.”

“Maybe we should sit outside.”

“Yep again.”

-

An hour later, they were getting stares from passersby for all of the enraged yelling that was happening at their table. Anger was pouring off of Hades and Kore in waves, and it showed no signs of stopping anytime soon.

“Why is this worded this way?! I don’t even know what this means how do you even understand this?” Hades threw the book onto the table. “And you’re teacher doesn’t explain  _ any _ of this mess? I’m upset  _ for _ you!”

“I know! Why do you think I needed your help? I wasn’t just asking because I was bored! I have no idea of what’s going on in this class.”

“...I’m calling Hecate, she speaks pretentious lawyer.”

“Thank Olympus. Tell her to meet us in my dorm, this seat is killing my butt.” She started packing up, and then kicked his foot. “Well, help me out here, you’re going to be my ride.”

“Sure. We’re stopping for snacks on the way though.”

“Obviously. There’s no way I’m gonna do any of this without some kind of sugar high.”

-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh dear god it was hard to do this. But I had to try, because people kept leaving the sweetest comments and I didn't want to leave them hanging. To quote my friend from creative writing, "i know i can write it but i still despise it with ever fiber of my body"
> 
> Thanks for reading guys! Next chapter should be a fun time, I'm hoping that it won't take an entire month to update this time.
> 
> As always, if you have questions or just wanna chat, hmu on theypanickedatthewrongdisco on tumblr. Don't forget to smash that kudos button on the way out!
> 
> See you next time lovelies!!!


	12. Kiss kiss fall in love (Platonically, at least)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The door swung open to reveal Kore in a crimson-red owl onesie with a blanket wrapped around her shoulders like a cape, and 3 blueberry poptarts in her hand. “Okay, I’m ready. Let’s go.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, that was a faster update than I thought it would be! Cool, cool, coolcoolcool

After a few days of Hades and Hecate tutoring Kore, Hades decided that he couldn’t go into that depressing dorm room one more time, so they relocated to his apartment. Even though it was definitely more comfortable than her room, Kore protested of a sense of duty to her dorm. That protest came in the form of eating every single piece of food she could find in his house.

While her grades and understanding of the subject had greatly improved, Hades’ disdain for her teacher had only grown. In fact, it had gotten to where when he had time, he would attend class with her and mock the teacher under his breath. 

“Kore, maybe you should hurry up a little bit, we’re going to be late.” Hades knocked on her door again and groaned. 

Kore’s muffled voice sounded through the door. “Why do you even care? You don’t even go here!”

“Because I’m making sure that you can get there on time. Also, I would never miss a chance to mock your stupid professor.”

The door swung open to reveal Kore in a crimson-red owl onesie with a blanket wrapped around her shoulders like a cape, and 3 blueberry poptarts in her hand. “Okay, I’m ready. Let’s go.”

He snickered. “Is it weird that I’m proud of you for being brave enough to wear that in public, but I’m also embarrassed to be seen with you?”

She shoved him towards the car. “Shut up nerd. You wish you were this cool.”

-

Hades smiled at Kore as he sat down at the table. Their experience at class had been...interesting, to say the least. The professor had been reading the textbook to the class again, and his monotone droning had sent three hungover students to sleep in the first five minutes.

Kore had been muttering something about food again, and had begun to kick the back of the seat in front of her while she struggled to stay awake. 

The kid in the seat had turned around, voice completely void of any semblance of life or inflection, had slowly whispered, “I will pickle your feet with urine.” Then he turned back to face the professor like nothing happened.

Kore’s face was completely blank, except for one twitching eye, and she slowly reached over and started shaking his arm. “Hades. Hades. Hades, did you hear that?” She began giggling. “Look at me. Hades. Pay attention to me you need to look at me  _ right now _ .”

He shook his head and forced himself to look at his textbook. “Shhh. You’re going to get us kicked out.” He made the terrible mistake of looking at her, and he lost it. 

They had turned red from the ill-concealed laughter. Tears were streaking down their faces. Kore attempted to calm down by hiding her face in her hoodie, but that just made him laugh harder because he could still see her shoulders shaking.

They had barely made it to the end of class without dying of asphyxiation.

Now they were sitting in the Raven’s Nest again, drinking coffee and eating a pile of pastries while Kore studied.

“So.” Said Hades in between bites of pastry. “What classes do you take besides criminology?”

“Uh. Hold on.”

“You don’t even remember what classes you’re taking?” He laughed, a teasing smile lighting up his face. “I knew all that caffeine that you were drinking would eventually bite you in the butt.” 

“I blanked out! I know exactly what classes I’m taking.”

“Oh yeah? What are they?”

She listed them off on her fingers. “Criminology, English Composition, Government, and Agriculture. That’s what I’m taking this semester.”

“Sounds busy.”

“Yeah, I-” She stopped speaking and rage spread across her face. 

Hades leaned forward and nudged her hand. “Hey, what happened? Is there something wrong?”

Kore pointed at who had just entered the shop. 

Standing there, awash in the lazy golden sunlight, stood the God of the Sun himself. Apollo.

While Hades was still frowning in confusion, Apollo smirked at Kore and sauntered over to her table like he owned the place. He drug out a chair and plopped down, propping his feet on the table, knocking her book’s off. He didn’t even notice Hades.

“Hey Kore. I’ve been calling you, why haven’t you answered? It’s not every girl who gets to go out with me.” 

Kore’s eyes were practically burning holes into Apollo’s forehead. “You know why. You stalked me, insulted my mother, and then you got aggressive.” She lurched over the table and grabbed his shirt. “You know  _ exactly _ why I didn’t call you back!”

Hades cleared his throat and calmly reached over and removed Kore’s hands from Apollo’s shirt. “Kore, he’s not worth getting banned from your favorite coffee shop. And you.” He said, turning towards Apollo and pushing the sun gods feet off the table. “You dropped her books. Pick them up.”

Apollo’s eyes widened “Y-your majesty, I-.” 

Hades kicked Apollo’s chair over. “Pick. Them. Up.”

Apollo scrambled to obey. There was a terrifying aura emanating from Hades. It was as if the dead were crawling over his shoulders to try and get to him. It had scared him into obedience. “Here you go.” He said weakly, gently putting the books on the table.

Kore decided then and there that Hades was probably one of the best friends that she would ever find in this life or the next.

Hades sat back in his chair, still the picture of terrifying grace. “Now apologize to Kore. Like you mean it.” His smile was more of a baring of fangs at this point. “Go on.”

Hands and voice visibly shaking by now, Apollo apologized. “I’m-I’m sorry for insulting your mother. And stalking you.” Hades waved him on. His voice got smaller. “And I’m sorry that I got aggressive.”

Kore just drank her coffee and stared at him dead in the eyes. “I don’t really care if you’re sorry. Get out.”

Apollo looked at Hades. Hades’ eyes went black. “You heard her. Get out.”

Apollo practically fell over himself getting to the door.

Immediately, any trace of anger rushed off of Hades’ face to be replaced by concern. “Are you okay? Do I need to take you home? Do want more coffee? Or a snack maybe?”

Kore just stared at him. “I love you so much right now.”

His eyes widened and his face burned. “Uh. What?”

She beamed him. “Yeah, I’ve never had a friend who would do that for me.”

He grinned. “It was nothing, I’ve been looking for an excuse to ruin his day for years.” Internally, his thoughts were a train wreck. They went along the lines of, “ _ Oh my gods oh my gods she said i’m her friend I feel so blessed i cant right now just !!!” _

“Well, whatever the reason, I’m glad you were here. I might have actually tried to commit murder if you hadn’t been here to step in.” 

He laughed and pushed her the last pastry. “Eh, no one would’ve even been upset about it.” 

-

After escorting her home and making sure that she would be able to go to class the next day, (When he asked her that, she laughed and told him that he was a nerd.) he went home so he could catch up on some paperwork.

He collapsed onto his couch and smiled into his pillow. “She said we were friends.”

-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AKIYtvuybrlwuercb this was soooo fun to write!!!!!!!! Thanks for reading, I'm so glad that y'all have taken the time to read this.
> 
> As always, if you have questions or just wanna chat, hmu on theypanickedatthewrongdisco on tumblr. Don't forget to smash that kudos button on the way out!
> 
> Stay in drugs, don't do school, and make sure to get at least 8 hours of gay. See you next time lovelies!!!


	13. I'm not gonna lie, this is totally a filler chapter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After they went to the coffee shop, they headed to Kore’s dorm. As soon as they got there, Aphrodite started looking around her room like she was conducting a drug search.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this is a short chapter. If you wanna know why, check the end notes i guess

Kore glanced up as she walked out of class and waved. “Aphrodite! Hey, where’ve you been? I haven’t seen you in forever.”

Aphrodite rolled her eyes and sauntered over. “Sup nerd. It’s been a minute, huh.”

Kore nudged her arm. “Yeah, now tell who’s so important that you stopped hanging out with me.”

“Hey, I didn’t stop hanging out with you. I’ve just been so busy that I haven’t had time.”

“Well, let’s go get pizza and you can tell me about it.”

Aphrodite raised an eyebrow at her. “You’re making me pay for it, aren’t you?”

Kore patted her shoulder. “Think of it as payback for ghosting me for so long.”

“It was literally like five days.”

“It was too long moron. Five days is too long.” Kore looped her arm through Aphrodites’ and drug her towards the Raven’s Nest. That coffee shop was quickly becoming like a second home to her.

-

After they went to the coffee shop, they headed to Kore’s dorm. As soon as they got there, Aphrodite started looking around her room like she was conducting a drug search.

Kore grabbed a bag of Cheetos. “Hey, not trying to interrupt your drug bust or anything, but what are you looking for?”

That comment earned her an eyeroll. “Kore, you know exactly what I’m looking for.”

“Uh, no?”

“The Red bull, Kore.” She took Kore’s shoulders and looked her in her eyes. “I’m making sure you don’t have a caffeine overdose. Now where did you hide it, because I’m gonna make sure that you don’t die a young death.”

Kore smirked. “You wouldn’t believe me if I told you.”

“Well, I beg to differ.”

“Then beg.”

“Oh my Rhea, Kore. Where’d you put the stupid Red bull.”

She hummed and dug some more Cheetos out of the bag. “Haven’t had any lately.”

Aphrodite squinted at her. “Lies. All lies.”

“Nope. No Red bull in, like, two weeks. Or around there, anyway.”

Aphrodite sat down on the bed in shoc. “How? You’ve been addicted to those since-since forever.”

Kore giggled. “Well, to be fair, I just replaced it with coffee. Me and Hades have coffee and study like every day.”

“Is that safe? What does your mom think about this?”

“Of course it’s safe! I don’t know why you people keep treating him like this, but he’s a whole lot nicer and more respectful than most of the gods I’ve ever met. And, honestly-”

Aphrodite held up her hands placatingly. “Okay, chill out, I believe you.” She reached over and grabbed the bag of Cheetos out of Kores hand. “But don’t think that I didn’t notice you avoided the question about your mom.”

Kore started worming under her blankets. “Yeah, well…she doesn’t know. _But,_ it’s only because I haven’t spoken to her since I started college.”

“Kore! Why haven’t you spoken to your mother? Family comes first, you don’t treat them like that.” She threw the empty Cheetos bag on the desk.

Kore leveled her with a look. “Calm down. She’s the one who’s not speaking to me, not the other way around. Mom didn’t like me being out from under her thumb, so she’s throwing a fit.” She shrugged and started kicking her feet back and forth. “I’ve been dealing with this for a while. I would love to have a conversation with her without screaming at each other, but, well. You know how she is.”

“Oh, honey. I’m so sorry, that must suck.” She hugged Kore. “I know what it’s like to argue with a parent, sometimes I still go throw rocks at the ocean.”

Kore snickered, her voice muffled by Aphrodite’s shoulder. “Oh yeah, I always forget that you’re an ocean baby.”

She rolled her eyes. “Tone down the disrespect young lady. I’ll have you know that being an ocean baby is pretty heckin cool.”

“Well, in any event, it’s not like I don’t have any family left. I’m actually going to meet my aunt and uncle for lunch tomorrow. It’s gonna to be a fun time.”

“Okay. It’s good that you’re keeping in touch with your family. I’m sure that your mom will see reason soon, she’s not crazy enough to let the best part of her life leave.” Aphrodite nudged Kore. “Hey, are you sure that you’re fine?”

Kore smiled at her. “Yeah, it’s all good.” She hopped off her bed and grabbed her laptop. “This got way too real, way too fast. Let’s watch Netflix and eat some Zebra cakes.”

“But you don’t have any Zebra cakes.”

Kore grinned and reached under her desk. “Don’t I?” There was a ripping sound, and she pulled a duct-tape covered box of zebra cakes from under her desk. “Surprise. I hid them from my roommate.”

“Oh my Rhea, this is the best thing that has happened to me all week.”

-

Kore muttered to herself as she waited in line for her drink. This is why she hated to go to coffee shops other than the Raven’s Nest, she reflected. This shop was crowded, loud, and she wasn’t sure if it was even worth it to stay in line for their suspicious smelling coffee.

After a nearly tear-inducing experience with the cashier, she stood in line waiting for her name to be called for twenty minutes. Now, she would have to run to meet Astraeus and Eos if she didn’t want to be late, and she had even left half an hour early just so that she could escape being late again.

She checked the time on her phone. 3:42 Okay, so, maybe if she hurried she could make it. She had a whole eighteen minutes, how could it possibly go wrong?

Nineteen minutes later, she had discovered exactly fifteen ways it could, and _did_ , go wrong. If she ever saw a mime walk into a Victoria’s Secret again, she might die.

But forget the mime incident. She was only a minute or so late, so that could’ve been much worse.

When she finally walked into the museum, she collapsed onto a bench to catch her breath and look around for her aunt and uncle. She didn’t see them anywhere.

After a few minutes in which she had an internal struggle about whether or not she should call them and see where they were, she looked at the door and saw Eos waltz in the door.

“Kore!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys, I'm so sorry. I know that the chapter was late and short. I'm having a really hard time in class right now, I don't get what's happening in chemistry and so I don't have time to write. I'm so tired all the time and the depression fairy is beating me with a stick and I'm not sure when the next chapter will be up. I swear that I'm not ending this fic, I've invested way too much into this to quit now, I just need a little time to pull myself together. 
> 
> If you have any questions or comments, feel free to leave them here or hmu on tumblr at theypanickedatthewrongdisco. 
> 
> Don't forget to smash that kudos button on the way out! See you next time lovelies <3


	14. In which a secret unicorn churro is acquired

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Pfft, you know you liked coming here.” Kore giggled. “Every time we came here, you lusted over those little baggies of rocks in the gift shop. I still worry that you’re going to leave Eos and have some kind of weird, kinky fling with a geode.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> !!!I'm back!!! It's been a minute, but I made it. AND, I brought an extra long chapter with me! Depression can suck my big toe.

Kore grinned and waved back. “What’s up, my dudes.”

After the perfuntionary hugs and hellos, Eos grinned and began dragging them farther into the museum. “First stop, the Unseen Ocean exhibit! Let’s go.”

“Aw, you remember my favorite part of the museum.”

Astraeus snorted. “Well it would be ridiculous if I didn’t remember, as many times as we took you here. I’m pretty sure I could draw the entire thing from memory.”

“Pfft, you know you liked coming here.” Kore giggled. “Every time we came here, you lusted over those little baggies of rocks in the gift shop. I still worry that you’re going to leave Eos and have some kind of weird, kinky fling with a geode.”

Astraeus looked like he had just been hit in the face with a barn owl. “...I literally have no idea of how to respond to that. To the ocean exhibit!”

Eos linked arms with Kore and snickered as they trailed behind Astraeus. “You know, I’ve had the exact same thoughts about Astraeus and the rocks. Except, you know.” She wiggled her eyebrows. “I’m having an affair with the really cool dinosaur jewelry they sell by the rocks.”

Kore laughed. “Well, obviously. The dinosaur jewelry is the the coolest thing that they sell in here.”

-

They ended up getting kicked out of the museum. Apparently, even though it was an exhibit _centered_ on the ocean, the staff got upset by visitors trying to swim with the dolphins. Or ride them. Or try to smuggle the baby dolphins out in a wagon that was not-so-stealthily covered with a tarp.

Even though she was still sad about not being able to give the dolphins the home they deserved, Kore walked out that museum laughing like a madwoman.

Suddenly, Astraeus stopped walking right in front of her. “Guys, we’re being idiots. Why haven’t we went to Build-A-Bear and gotten stuffed dolphins yet?” His look of pure shock and outrage sent Kore and Eos into yet another fit of giggles.

Eos groaned. “Oh god, I’m so tired right now, but you’re right. There’s no way I can miss out on that.” She smiled over at Kore. “You up for a trip to the mall, lovebug?”

“First of all, yes, because what fool would say no to Build-A-Bear. Second of all, I don’t think anyone has ever called me lovebug before, and I’m not quite sure how to feel about it.” She glanced at the floor and rubbed the back of her neck awkwardly. “I guess it reminds me of how Mom used to be.”

Eos tilted her head. “Is that a bad thing? In general, I mean.”

“Uhhhh…no, it’s not a bad thing. Just different.” Kore thought for a second, and then made a ridiculously pathetic attempt at jazz hands. “Sorry, I just made this really weird and stilted. Let’s pretend that the last five minutes didn’t happen, okay?””

Astraeus smirked.”What last five minutes?” He turned to Eos, with parental concern written all over his face. “I’m pretty sure that this means she needs double the stuffed animals, though.”

“Y’know what, I think you’re right.” Eos pulled a keychain from inside her bag. “C’mon nerds. Let’s go make some bears.”

-

Build-A-Bear was different than how she remembered it being. Although it was still filled with cheerful stuffed animals of all shapes and sizes, it didn’t feel quite the same as it used to.

The last time she had been there was about ten years ago, after another fight with her mom about wanting to go to college. She had ended up wandering around a mall and had stumbled across this store.  
Back then, the animals were filled with beads and not stuffing. She remembered picking the perfect colors to fill her new rabbit with. Black, yellow, and red, with just a sprinkle of pink to brighten up the rabbits day. She ended up keeping that rabbit. It was still sitting on the end of her bed to this day.

Kore came out of her nostalgia filled memories just in time to witness what could possibly be one of the top ten weird things she’s seen this year.

Astraeus was talking to one of the girls who worked there, (whose name was apparently April) about what the proper procedure for reanimating a stuffed animal was. They both seemed very intent on having Eos act it out, and she didn’t seem like she was going to put up much of a resistance.

At a nod from April, Eos began to do every single Fornite dance she could think of while yodeling some butchered up of Jolene. Astraeus was in tears. April was videoing the entire thing. Five shelves were knocked over, and somehow Kore’s shoe ended up inside of the stuffing machine.

While Kore was still trying to figure out how her shoe even got off her foot in the first place, April commanded Eos to backflip off of the counter. Eos couldn’t backflip. As soon as she landed, there was an audible crunch.

They grabbed their stuffed animals, thanked a collapsed on the floor cry-laughing April, and dashed out of the store.

After Eos healed her arm, both wrists, her leg, and quite inexplicably her ear, Kore decided that Auntie-Anne’s was the next stop on her list. The cinnamon pretzels were, in all seriousness, life changing. And she had lived for a few thousand years, so that was saying something.

Kore had just walked up to the counter and was about to order when she heard someone whispering behind her. It sounded like there was a secret menu; and according to the not-so-quiet whisperers behind her, there was a one pound sugar churro, dipped in a mysterious unicorn sauce that was to _die_ for.

Kore’s eyes narrowed. Attaining this mysterious churro was now her new life goal. This was gonna be Nerf, or nothin. Except with churros instead of toy guns. She squared her shoulders and looked the cashier in the eyes.

The tired looking girl at the register glanced at Kore before launching into some spiel about buying seventeen pretzels and getting one free. When the girl was finally done speaking, Kore crossed her fingers that the churro was real.Then she took that final, fateful step to the counter. “Hi, I was just wondering if the unicorn churro was available?”

The cashier rolled her eyes and nodded. “Yeah, but it’s like forty bucks.”

Kore grinned with the strength of a thousand suns.”I want two. And also some cinnamon bites and a Coke.”

“Your total is fifty-two sixty. Do you want to pay with cash or charge?”

After she paid Kore grabbed her food and went to sit down while her unofficial aunt and uncle went to order. She spotted a bench that was conveniently situated by the wall, with miniature palm trees acting as a barrier between the bench and the heavy foot traffic.

As she wove her way through the crush of pedestrians, someone crashed into her. Her pretzel bites flew across the floor, her Coke spilled on her like that was it’s life’s goal, and it was only through years of knife throwing practice with Eos that she didn’t drop her unicorn churros. “No! My cinnamon bites, my one true loves!” She sighed and turned to who had run into her this time. “Oh. It’s you again.”

Hades was looking right back at her with guilt written across his face. If you were to try to convey the emotion of ‘I messed up’ in a single picture, it would be his exact face right then. “I am so sorry, this just keeps happening.” He pulled a handkerchief out of his pocket and began wiping at the mess cover her shirt. “Here, let me just get this-”

He was cut of by Kore carefully pushing his hands away from her shirt. “Okay, I know that you’re trying to help right now, but you hands are in places that your hands should not be.”

His face flamed into its best imitation of a tomato. “Oh gods, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to touch- um.” He made a vague gesture towards her torso. “Those.”

“Apology accepted. But I’m not really sure of how to proceed with this conversation, after the...unprompted groping.”

“I could buy you more food? And some new clothes to change into? And again, I’m so sorry about running into you. For like the fortieth time.” He looked so much like a puppy who was excited to be told that he was doing a good job that she couldn’t help but laugh.

“Yeah, okay. Go get the food, then we’ll go grab some clothes. And when you get back, I have a unicorn churro with you name on it.”

He scrunched his nose. “A what now?”

She patted his shoulder. “Just trust me on this one. Now get me some food, fool.”

He rolled his eyes, but walked off into the direction of Auntie-Anne’s.

She heard a gasp behind her.

“We left for five minutes, what happened?” Esos was staring at her while Astraeus laughed and took pictures. “Did we have an earthquake that I didn’t notice? How..why...” She waved to Kore’s Coke soaked shirt.

“Well. It all started with a nerd who can’t watch where he’s going.” But before she could launch into her sorry tale of horror and woe, Hades appeared beside her.

“Okay, I got you some more snacks, another Coke, and extra napkins so you can dry off more before we get you some new clothes.” He noticed Eos and Astraeus staring at him. “Nice to meet you again. I’d shake your hands, but.” He held up Kores food.

Eos smiled cordially at him. “It’s lovely to see you again as well, Lord Hades.”

Kores brows furrowed. “Wait, how do you know each other?”

“We’ve existed together for a few thousand years, give or take. It would be weirder if we didn’t know each other.” Astraeus pointed at Hades and Kore. “I think a better question would be, how do _you two_ know each other?”

Hades shrugged. “She found my dog, and then she broke her ankle at a party. One thing led to another, and now I tutor her in Criminology.”

Kore laughed. “That was the worst explanation I’ve ever heard. Like, c’mon nerd, what even was that?”

“Hey, it covered all the bases.”

“No, that’s what you were trying to do with your hands a few minutes ago.”

While she and Hades began to argue, Eos and Astraeus shared a soft smile. Eos nodded, and then she smacked Hades and Kore on their heads. “Hey! We are in public, now act like adults. Or if that doesn’t work for you, then maybe a semi-mature twelve year old.”

Hades cleared his throat. “Yes, right, of course. Apologies.”

Astraeus threw his arm around Eos’ shoulders. “Alright. Now that that’s cleared up, Eos and I are going to Leave you two to go shopping.” He held up his hand before Kore could protest. “No, you know that you don’t want us two old folk tagging along behind you while you’re having fun.”

“Also,” He leaned in and whispered. “Your aunt just took a trip to Victoria’s Secret a few days ago, so I should really make sure that everything fits right.”

Kores face looked like she had just tried to eat a lemon. “Tmi, dudes. I didn’t really need to know that.”

“Yeah, yeah. We’ve heard it all before.” Eos and Astraeus both hugged Kore. “Hey, lovie, can you give us and Hades a minute? We need to speak to him about some work stuff. It’ll only be a moment.”

“Uh, sure, I guess.”

Eos and Astraeus turned to Hades. “Let’s get right to it, shall we?”

Hades nodded. “Of course.”

“We approve.”

Hades  raised a brow. “Pardon?”

Astraeus ran a hand through his hair. “You and Persephone. You make her happy, so we’re giving you our approval.”

“Hold on, what?” Hades frowned in confusion. “What’s your approval even for? Are you really that careful about tutors?”

Eos snorted. “No. But we _are_ that careful about future boyfriends.”

-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As previously stated, it's been a hot second since I updated. During that time, I figured a few better ways to deal w/ anxiety+depression, so everything's been so much less stressful. Also, I got my first fanart! Shoutout to BundleOfTeenAngst for this rad artwork, I love it so much! Edit: I'm a fool and I can't for the life of me figure out how to add the art on here, so if you wanna see it, you'll have to go see it on my blog! 
> 
> As always, if you have questions or just wanna chat, hmu on theypanickedatthewrongdisco on tumblr. Don't forget to smash that kudos button on the way out!
> 
> See you next time lovelies!!!


	15. Both churros and realizations are found in vomit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hades stared into the empty nothingness of the T-shirt section at Hot Topic. In the back of his mind, he vaguely heard Kore buzzing around and saying something about a new jacket; but he was still too shell shocked to listen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sup nerds. I haven't posted on time since like, last November, so this is a new experience to me. It's p exciting tho. Enjoy this sick new chapter that I wrote when I was supposed to be doing research in chemistry.

Hades stared into the empty nothingness of the T-shirt section at Hot Topic. In the back of his mind, he vaguely heard Kore buzzing around and saying something about a new jacket; but he was still too shell shocked to listen.

Boyfriend?! What kind of immortality-induced insanity was that! He and Kore were just good friends, thank you very much. 

He had tried to say as much to Eos and Astraeus, but all they had done was nod their heads and say “Sure, we believe you.” in that way that you know that they totally don’t believe you. His protestations had obviously meant nothing to them, and now he was zoned out and staring at a shirt that just said  _ Spend your life doing weird things with weird people.  _

He snorted. Well, considering that he hung out with Kore, Hecate, and Thanatos, he definitely had that figured out. How he had ended up so attached to those weirdos, he would never know. 

He was still glad that he knew them though. He probably wouldn’t even  _ want  _ to survive without his friends around.

“Hey Hades.” Kore called him over to the other side of the store. “What do you think about this?” SHe held up a black dress with a white collar. “I’m trying to decide if it looks too much like an anime girl’s school uniform. Opinions?”

“Yeah, it does kind of look like that. It’s too plain. It needs…” He glanced around the store. “Follow me.”

“Okay.” She started snickering and poking his arm. “Are we about to montage? Like, are you gonna pile up my arms with clothes and belts and stuff, and then make me try it on? Oh my Rhea, are you gonna make me do spins while you stand in the corner and do that whole iconic head shake thing?”

“It all depends on how good that unicorn churro is gonna be.” He tossed a pile of belts into her arms.

“Honestly, that’s fair. But are you sure that this belt is gonna look right?” She held up a black, heavily spiked belt. “It looks like you stole it from an early 2000’s emos closet.”

He nodded sagely and grabbed a pair of Vans. “That’s the point. I’m pretty sure that music peaked somewhere around 2004.”

“Oh, mood.”

“Yep. Now, how do you feel about black eye shadow and nose rings?”

“As long as I come out of this looking like Gerard Way, I don’t care.”

-

A few hours later, Hades and Kore walked out of the mall. Kore was excited in her new clothes, and Hades looked like he had just lost a fight with a muskrat. There was fear in his eyes, and an empty wallet in his pocket.

When they finally made it to Hades’ car, he paused to ask a question. “Hey, do you need me to give you a ride? The bus is a bit of a long walk from here, and it wouldn’t be a problem.”

“Oh, yeah, that would be great. Thanks nerd.” She threw her bags onto the backseat. “If you’re not busy, would you wanna come over and help me study? I have a test next week, and help would be much appreciated.”

“You could come over and study right now, if you want. Hecate’s on this new ‘keep me from working myself to death’ kick, and as a result, she won’t let me bring work home anymore.”

“Sure. I have literally nothing else to do today.”

Hades smiled and opened the car door for her. “Wow, don’t I feel special.” He frowned and walked over to his door. They really  _ were _ just friends. Right?

-

Plopping onto Hades’ overly stuffed couch, Kore unzipped her backpack and pulled out her books and a stack of notes three inches tall. Hades had just shrugged off his jacket and tossed it on the back of his chair, when he noticed Kore staring at him with a pink and purple sugar-covered churro in her hand. 

“What?”

Kore calmly slid a small package across the couch to Hades. “It’s time.” She nodded at him. “We need to find out if these are any good.”

“I thought we were going to study.” He saw the hopeful look on Kore’s face; sighed, and then looked back at the churro for a minute. “But I’m sure that we will learn better with a snack to keep up our blood sugar. Let’s do it.”

The churros turned out to be a mistake. The sugar-to-pastry ratio was so insanely weighted towards the sugar that it was nearly intolerable after two bites. Hades gave up after three; but Kore unfortunately decided that since she paid for them, she was going to eat the whole thing. 

Two minutes after she finished it, she ended up vomiting into Hades’ toilet, while Hades held her hair away from her face and patted her back. “It’s okay, just breathe. When you’re feeling better, we can go chill on the couch and get you something to drink. And possibly watch the next episode of Santa Clarita Diet, but we can argue about that later.”

Kore groaned and leaned back against him. “I think I actually died a little bit. Like, there might be a whole organ in your toilet right now.” She peered into the bowl. “Oh, yeah, look. I think that lump right there is a kidney.”

He snorted, then got up and handed her a wet washcloth. “Are feeling a little bit less like you’re going to die now?”

“I could definitely feel worse, but like, I still feel like the juice at the bottom of a dumpster. You feel?”

“Yeah, I feel.” He crouched down beside her. “I’m not trying to be condescending or demeaning, so please don’t try to kill me.”

“You lost me.”

He rolled his eyes, and then scooped her up and began walking back to the living room. Kore screeched and immediately began hitting his chest. “What are you doing?! Put me down!” 

“You  just threw up for five straight minutes, I’m worried about you trying to walk and then falling! What would happen if you hit your head?” He carefully sat her down on the couch. “Hey look, I’m alive.”

Kore kicked his shin. “I could’ve done it myself, you know. It’s not like I broke my leg or something.”

“Kore, you are insanely capable. You are making great grades in college.

Somehow, you have been surviving on nothing but Redbull for who knows how long. You are one of a  _ very _ small group of people that can survive an argument with your mother.” He tossed her a blanket. “You are more than capable of walking down a hallway by yourself. You just shouldn’t have to do that after you just threw up everything you’ve eaten in the last twenty-four hours.”

Kore’s faced flamed. “Okay, shut up now. Miss me with that feelings shit.”

“Aw, you can’t take compliments. That’s adorable.”

She scrubbed her hands over her face and laughed. “You’re gonna have to stop, I don’t do affection.”

“Fine, fine.” He grabbed the stack of notes and the Tv remote.”Okay, we have three options. We can study. We can watch Netflix. Or, we can compromise and study while we watch Netflix.”

“My heart says Netflix, but my sense of responsibility says study.”

“So...compromise?”

“Yup.”

“Santa Clarita Diet?”

Kore hummed. “How do you feel about John Mulaney?”

“We’ll find out in a minute, I guess.” Hades smiled at her while she shuffled through her notes. Being just friends was fine with him if it meant she would stay around. No relationship was worth losing her over. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, hope you enjoyed this chapter as much as I liked writing it!
> 
> As always, if you have questions or just wanna chat, hmu on theypanickedatthewrongdisco on tumblr. Don't forget to smash that kudos button on the way out!
> 
> See you next time lovelies!!!


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